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My new girlfriend is confusing! Does she like me, or doesn't she?

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Question - (29 September 2005) 6 Answers - (Newest, 16 October 2007)
A male , anonymous writes:

I have recently started dating this new girl and am confused about the signals see is giving me. I met her at a party and we hooked up (we were both sober). I liked her but see didn't like me.

Then about a month later, she all of a sudden, liked me and we are now dating. We attend the same school and we were hitting it off great, but as soon as the holidays came it's gone downhill. I ring her up to talk and after about 5 minutes of chatting she says she has to go....

The other day we organised a date and she cancelled an hour before saying she was "sick". On the flip side she gives hints that she actually does like me, such as that she misses me and so forth.

When we are together it's great and it's obvious that she likes me, but she's giving me mixed signals. Advice please. Thanks

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A male reader, anonymous, writes (16 October 2007):

me and u have the same problem but the advice given by the above helped me out so if i was u i wud go with the third peice of advice given

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A male reader, anonymous, writes (3 June 2007):

she probably likes you but not enough to be your girlfriend.

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A male reader, anonymous, writes (6 April 2006):

NO

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A female reader, xixi +, writes (3 October 2005):

She is definitely confused about her life and doesn't know what she really wants. I don't think it's worth the agony of being strung along to keep pursuing her. She may like you enough to have around to keep her company, but she may not like you enough for a deep and meaningful relationship. So I wouldn't have high expectations for this to turn into anything more if I were you. So, keep shopping around fora girl who has her life more together and more into you.

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A female reader, anonymous, writes (30 September 2005):

I had the same problem with someone I met a few months ago, who kept giving me mixed signals. I knew he was stressed because of a new job and some problems with his sister so didn't say anything.

Then one day, ill advised by well meaning friends, I decided to have a chat with him about how things were going. Fatal mistake, he took it very badly, completely freaked out and he dumped me within a week.

If you force her to talk about it while she is confused, she might freak out too and make a sudden decision. I am wondering if you are not better off keeping quiet about it for a few weeks or months and see how things go

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A reader, Rebecca Batchelor +, writes (29 September 2005):

Rebecca Batchelor agony auntPerhaps the best thing to do is to find out a little more about her life. Is there something that is keeping her very occupied particularly in the holiday times? Something at home maybe?

Without making it obvious that you are probing, show some interest in her home life and other things that she does besides school.

She could be giving mixed signals because she is uncertain as to what she really wants and is confused herself. Explain to her how you feel; open the communication channels between you.

It could simply be that she has other things on her mind as you say how well you get on together. Talk to her but give her some time to build trust and be able to confide in you.

Good luck.

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