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My new boyfriend doesn't give me the attention that my old one did

Tagged as: Dating, The ex-factor<< Previous question   Next question >>
Question - (21 August 2015) 2 Answers - (Newest, 21 August 2015)
A female United States age 30-35, *nonem writes:

I am not getting the same attention I got from my ex boyfriend as my current boyfriend. I and my ex always talked everyday till we got tired of each other. Not to seem to clingy or something, my current bf can go a day without talking to me. It's breaking me. I am so used to always talking to someone everyday. How do I deal with this? We've been dating for about a week and I expect the relationship to be all lovey dovey but it's not.

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A female reader, anonymous, writes (21 August 2015):

Sometimes due to conflicting work hours I can go 3 or 4 days without actually having a conversation with my husband...you need to chill out.

You've been together a WEEK! Carry on wanting constant attention and you might not last another. See your friends, find things that interest you and be your own person. Perhaps your ex constantly contacted you and that was a factor in the relationship not working. If you talk all the time then your topics of conversation are going to get boring.

Being in a relationship should add to your life, and in the early days it should fit around your existing life not become your life. It's not healthy expecting and craving you partner to text and call all the time. Let him have space.

Ask yourself why you need that contact? Do you not trust partners and so want to know in detail what there doing?

Do you just have no interests of your own outside a relationship? Whatever it is, ask yourself why you do it and then work on that. If you don't trust people easily then you need to work on giving someone that trust.

Just remind yourself that you and your ex broke up for a reason, so you shouldn't go into a new relationship expecting anything to be the same x good luck x

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A female reader, Honeypie United States + , writes (21 August 2015):

Honeypie agony auntDING DING DING

Your current BF is not your ex. He is not a carbon copy of the old one and is NOT going to be doing the EXACT same things as the ex. He is not going to LIKE the same things, wear the same things, eat the same things etc....

It's been a WEEK!

LEARN to be a little bit more self reliant and independent. Have your own friends, spend time with them, FIT him IN your schedule, don't build your whole world around him.

It IS clingy to want this constant contact.

Now if you feel he isn't as interested in you, then maybe he isn't for you. But not everyone are glued to their phones and have a need for constant texting and attention.

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