A
female
age
30-35,
*ony.J
writes:how unfair is it to not let you'r 16 year old daughter stay at her boyfriends for one night?my mother wont trust me, even tho she was stayin over at my dads all the time when she was my age. she refuses me to stay over at my boyfriend.how can i make her trust me?how can i make her let me stay at his for one night?how unfair is my mum really being?please let me know, i want answersthank you Reply to this Question
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female
reader, littlelady.  +, writes (13 November 2009):
Maybe your parents are just doing what they think is right for you. i mean, im 16 and i've been with my boyfriend for 2 years. i can pretty much do what i like, sleep at his, he sleeps at mine, i'm allowed to drink but i'm not allowed to smoke or do drugs, which is understandable. i'm not christian either. maybe if you tried sitting down with your mum and telling her things like:- we'll sleep with the door open,- tell your parents they can speak to his parents to see how they feel about it and then both parents can agree on somehting, knowing what both sides wantyou just have to try thing and talk about things. they're just looking out for their little girl (:hope that helps sweety.xo
A
male
reader, anonymous, writes (28 July 2009): i am so anoyed at all these people who are saying she isnt being unfair she just loves you
yeah loving you is all well and good , but letting your child grow up is a must , parents are too over protective and it really is unfair , you are 16 , its legal , so just do it , your mum cant stop you tbh
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A
female
reader, anonymous, writes (27 July 2009): hey sweetie,
i'm 16 and my mum wont let me stay over my boyfriends! We've beeen together for over a year and she still wont let me!
My mum doesnt care abbout sex she says its inappropriate to be staying at a boys house she knows nothing will happen but she still wont let me!
It sucks man, but we have to get on with it, nout we can do, ive done it behind her back ands it worked so far, ut you cant do that forever.
Me and my mum aint close so i cant talk to her at all. All my friends stay over their boyfriends, so i sympathise with you!
xxx
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female
reader, anonymous, writes (20 July 2009): i understand where your mother is comming from, she is probably a christan and believes not to have sex until you are married. but i also understtand were you are comming from too though, you love your boyfriend and woul think he could be the one and you want him everyday. if he makes you happy than, tell your mother that. and im sure your mother will understand. but dont give her any attitude or she ofcourse wount let you.and tell her you and him dont want to have sex till you two are married
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female
reader, Lesbina +, writes (17 July 2009):
Your parents are probably protective of you and dont want you to rush into any thing with your boyfriend, if you are close to your mum then sit down and talk to her about it, tell her how you feel about him, and she may deicde to take you to the ddoctors to go on the pill so that you cant get pregnant x
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female
reader, evilcats  +, writes (14 December 2008):
im almost 20 and my mom wont let me stay the night at my bf house its not just you
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male
reader, anonymous, writes (12 July 2008): One night? ONE NIGHT! It only takes one frikin night...why do you think there are so many single teenage mums in this country today...because stupid chicks that think they're old enouph to experience adult life, like yrself, are going ahead and doing wat they like...
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female
reader, STEPH LOVIN MEL +, writes (11 July 2008):
my mum is the same i got caught with boys in my house drinkin and ma boyfreind was wanting to stay she doseent trust me now and i have to come in at 10.30 how boring is that tell ur mum that its only for the night she should let u talk it over ur 16 now
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A
reader, anonymous, writes (28 June 2008): shes not that unfair, mabey u should let ur b/f explain things to her. She could see the other side of it from sumone else
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A
female
reader, sarah_s +, writes (27 June 2008):
 Your mum is not being unfair. She just has the respect for you like all mums for their children. If you have a reason to sleep over at your boyfriend's house such as; if your staying there for just a sleepover then your mum has a reason to decline. Here's my mum's thoughts.
I'm 18 and my mum didn't like the idea because, she said said I'm not living or moving in with my boyfriend yet and the process is too fast for now. Although, my mum allowed me to sleep over at my boyfriend's house last night because, he was going away for a month so this was a ocassionly a reason for her to allow me.
But, don't use my way to change it.. Just respect your mum's thoughts and accept what you have because, you still have a life ahead of you. Be patience.
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female
reader, scrazy  +, writes (27 June 2008):
 Please, that's not unfair.
It would be unfair if you were banned from seeing your boyfriend, for no reason whatsoever. It would be unfair if your boyfriend wasn't allowed to come to the house or you weren't allowed to go to his house.
A lot of things are unfair - what you're asking of your mother, is not.
My mom would laugh in my face if I ever asked to stay the night at my boyfriend's.
The reason she's saying no, even though she used to stay over at your dad's "all the time" is because she already knows what goes on when young teens are together alone in a bed! And because you are her child, she's trying to prevent it!
She's just trying to look out for you and do what she think is best. I doubt that trust is an issue - as my mom says, "It's not you I don't trust, it's HIM!"
Just drop the issue and don't try to bug her into getting your way; its not going to work.
You're still young, when you're older and moved out of the house, you can have as many sleepovers with your boyfriends as you want.
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female
reader, Livinglifedaybyday +, writes (27 June 2008):
Yeah, your mother is most likely not allowing you to spend the night because she knows from experience what could happen or got very near to finding out. It may seem unfair, and you might not even have sex in mind, but when the moment presents itself and your in the moment..anything could happen because your not thinking straight. Your mother most likely trusts you, but knows this fact and does not want you to end up making a mistake (getting pregnant..(cuz nothing is completely safe) or stds and or etc). If she didn't trust you dear, she wouldn't allow you to date in the first place. Just wait two years when you can make your own decisions and your mother is no longer fully responsible for them.
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female
reader, Tremor +, writes (27 June 2008):
 Don't act like you're so hard done to, it's not that big of a deal.
I'm 18 and my mother doesn't like me staying over at my boyfriend's, so I don't.
Your mother is just doing what she feels is best for you. She knows that if you are sleeping over, you are most likely having sex, and no mother likes to hear that her kids are sexually active. She is not being unfair, she is trying to protect you from the same mistake she made, so have some respect for the woman and don't whine.
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female
reader, GuardianAngel +, writes (27 June 2008):
 Hi There Dony I am Guardian Angel I do understand why your mum won't let you stay there it's not that she doesn't trust you it's the fact that you are only 16 and most people know what's gonna happen if you stay at his house you are going to sleep in the same bed and end up having sex with him I met boy when I was 15 he was 21 but I dated him and three days after my 16th birthday my mum found out about him I was dating him and having sex for three montha before she found out and at first she didn't want me staying at his house it is not 1year and five mths and they get on fantastically and I am really glad. Just ask you mother if it's because she doesn't trust you and I bet you £1,000,000 that she will say I do trust you it's just I'm worried about you okay sweetheart! Yours Sincerely Guardian AngelP.S If you want anything else hunni just write to me ok xx
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female
reader, anonymous, writes (27 June 2008): No honey, 16 years old is supposed to be not to stay one night on boy friend, your mother did it when she was on your age and now she know what is going to happen then, 16 years old should be focusing on enjoying life being student,teenager and have fun with friends, enjoying time being young.. dont be hurry on relationship its not really advisable.. if you have a boyfriend, take it as a experience not serious. good luck
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female
reader, SugarCookie +, writes (27 June 2008):
Yeah I'm 19 and my bf started staying over at 15 and we were having sex. Your mom knows that if you are not having sex now then you are more likely to do it if you stay the night. She isn't being unfair she is being protective. Sorry but I'm on your moms side!
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female
reader, kissmepink123  +, writes (27 June 2008):
 well u are 16 your ready to have sex and she knows it trust me my mom dont let me either cuz she thinks im a slut so just dont wrry about it and deal with it srry truth sucks buh bye.;]
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female
reader, anonymous, writes (27 June 2008): not so unfair, you're pretty young...my mom would have laughed at my face if i had asked at 16...and I'm only 20 right now, so not that long ago.
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