A
female
age
41-50,
anonymous
writes:GreetingsWhat do you say to this!My husband wanted me to pretend like he was my ex while we were having sex. And my husband said it was harmless fun role play. And I said Role play is nurse/doctor, cops/robbers, etc. Not the ex. I told husband he sounds insecure, and I was not going to pretend anything because he is not the ex.
View related questions:
insecure, my ex Reply to this Question
Share |
Fancy yourself as an agony aunt? Add your answer to this question! A
female
reader, B123  +, writes (9 February 2009):
 Whoops sorry well again if that is the case, I would just say I am simply not liking this idea and it hurts me - please can you not request this of me because I do not find it healthy towards the growth of our relationship. If he cares enough about you - he will think about your words and try to respect your wishes - good luck! B
A
male
reader, aman +, writes (7 February 2009):
I doubt he is insecure about you and your ex... more likely he is excited about the thought of you being with your ex. Some men get off on other men having sex with their wife. It is possible he is too afraid of your reaction to express that, and so he let it out in this slightly smaller way.That's just one possibility of course. Maybe he is insecure.Talking to him probably won't get him to reveal either way. Either draw the line and say no, or agree and see where this leads.
...............................
A
female
reader, Plexi  +, writes (6 February 2009):
 could it be that he wants to pretend like he is your ex as in....you guys went out...broke up......now reunited and found a new spark that could lead to passionate make-up sex?
just a thought! if thats the case its not so bad but if he wants to pretend like he is a specific ex of yours then he has issues and i would not entertain the idea:)
good luck hun!
...............................
A
female
reader, anonymous, writes (6 February 2009): B123 this is not about his ex, it is about the husband wanting the wife to pretending that the husband is the wife's ex boyfriend. Read the question again.
...............................
A
reader, anonymous, writes (6 February 2009): Hmm, I don't know how you could conclude this is really about his ex.....but I think it his idea of pretending to be your ex is really weird, it would be like having three people in the bed, and for you it would be too crowded.
Just state simply that you don't like the idea, but I would ask him to explain his reasons instead of just "telling" him what they are, in that he is insecure...you want him to feel like you understand his intentions behind it or otherwise he won't feel heard....but you don't have to explain why you don't like it or argue the point, simply say NO.
...............................
A
female
reader, B123 +, writes (6 February 2009):
It sounds like he is not yet over his ex (whatever happened there in the past) and is wishing he was still with her - and this is at the heart of what is upsetting you, right? well hun, do not get sad I think its merely a stupid fantasy stuck in his head, so dont worry. I know you love him lots cos you married and stuff but I think he needs to open up about his real feelings. If he is into role play he should not go hurting your feelings at the same time in the process and its no harm you tell him this. Tell him you are not comfortable with the idea as its hurtful to you and if he does not respect you enough to understand this and take care of your feelings you will not tolerate it and refuse to give him sex anymore until he actually wants you and not your ex as his fantasy - see how he responds but remember if you do give him this ultimatum you have to carry it through otherwise you will get nowhere with him. Its my sincere advice - hope it helps! good luck..B
...............................
|
