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My husband is pressuring me for a threesome.

Tagged as: Big Questions, Family, Marriage problems, Sex, Three is a crowd<< Previous question   Next question >>
Question - (26 May 2015) 11 Answers - (Newest, 27 May 2015)
A female India age 36-40, *annu writes:

Hi..We r married not very happily but married for 6yrs..I feel n it's true my husband was never true with me.no doubt he loves me n kids but he's very confused b character less person.since 5 yrs he's pressuring me for three some.every time he wants threesom sex with other women. now m thinking to accept his demand for domestic peace n sexual life..m worried wether it Wil spoil more my married life n kids life

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A male reader, anonymous, writes (27 May 2015):

Put my marriage on the rocks and I still can not forgive or trust

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A female reader, anonymous, writes (27 May 2015):

Dont do it! Once you give in and have one he will keep asking..it will not bring domestic peace...it will make it worse.

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A female reader, anonymous, writes (27 May 2015):

I agree with the other reader who said you tell him yes but only if it's with another man . Ughhhh can't believe what some men will say and do !

Don't do it !!!!!!!!! You will regret it forever , it will destroy your happiness and self respect . If he won't let up , maybe you need to consider a different relationship

Ps tell him to stop watching so much porn

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A male reader, Garbo United States +, writes (26 May 2015):

Garbo agony auntIf you don't want a 3some then don't do it. It is as simple as that big he can't respect your stand then who cares because at least you are not doing stuff that you find wrong. Stay strong in resisting.

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A female reader, anonymous, writes (26 May 2015):

Agree with the answers above. Don't let him pressure you into doing anything you don't want to.

To stop him pestering you for a threesome, maybe you could try some other new things in the bedroom together (just the two of you) instead.

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A reader, anonymous, writes (26 May 2015):

Hi

I can understand your situation, dont do it. He will do emotional blackmailing like "if you really love me, you will do it for me.", dont buy this, its purely nonsense.

Since your husband has been asking you to have threesome with other woman for continuous 5 years, you can realize that he doesnt love you, he just want sex. I would ask you to leave him, if you have a job and understanding parents. I know, Indian parents wont agree with this divorce things, because they think about their social status.

If you cant leave him, meet a sexologist/psychologist and seek help, if you could go along with him.

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A female reader, farfaposa United States +, writes (26 May 2015):

Tell him OK, but you want the threesome to be with another man, not another woman. If he agrees, you have a lot of fun, if not, you tell him fair is fair—if you can’t have your threesome, he can’t have his.

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A female reader, Honeypie United States + , writes (26 May 2015):

Honeypie agony auntNEVER do something sexually or otherwise that YOU DO NOT want to do.

He will keep asking and you can keep saying no, YOU DO NOT owe him 3-somes. And you will NOT achieve domestic bliss if you agree. No, he will want more 3-somes and preferable without you joining it.

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A female reader, anonymous, writes (26 May 2015):

Tell your husband yes but only if you can pick the other person.Then keep who you get a secret from him.On the night you have this planned tell him to walk into the bedroom naked.Boy will he be surprized when he sees that you picked a very hot man who is hung way bigger than he could ever be.Turn about is fair play.

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A female reader, anonymous, writes (26 May 2015):

Three words.

DON'T DO IT.

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A female reader, like I see it United States +, writes (26 May 2015):

like I see it agony auntThe next time I hear of a threesome improving someone's marriage will be the first time. Even when both parties start out 100% OK with the idea, sooner or later someone ends up unhappy. And based on your post, I somehow doubt this will be a "one and done" thing for your husband... if you give in once, the new interruption to your domestic peace will be pressure from him about when the NEXT threesome can take place... since pressuring you will have "worked" the first time.

It doesn't matter whether he would LIKE permission to sleep with other women in front of you... you do not have to give him permission to do so.

You may not be able to control what he does without your knowledge, especially if leaving him isn't a legal or cultural option for you, but definitely don't allow him to pressure YOU into participating in sexual acts you want no part of.

Good luck and best wishes.

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