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female
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*ordan2006
writes: Hi thereI have a problem,I have been married for 4 years the years was not smooth.Now for the 1st time there is another females invovle.My sister told me that there is naked picture of a woman on my husband phone,when I qeustion him about it he said he downloaded it from a friend but he told her that this lady send it to him.Once he ask her if she wants to posed for naked photos which she refused and I question him about he said he just wanted to she what her answers was and I ask him the night the same question then he lied and said he ask if she didnt have any friends that wants to do it.And he waches porn and I couhtg him many a time in chat rooms on the phone and when I want to see what he is busy with then he is done chatting.And she told me that he is flirting with young girls in the chat rooms.Now when I told him that I know all of these things he is the rudest person that you can get and now it looks as if I am the guilty one.Last nigth he told me he is going to move out because he cant go on onother year like this,he wants to make me feel guilty which I believe I am not the problem.Is he guilty or not?What should I do?My christian believe is that I should stay in the marriage,I just dont know.This is his second marraige,it lasted six months,he said his first wife cheated on him.
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female
reader, anonymous, writes (10 December 2006): whilst i empathise with you and understand the pornography thing to be a 'human guy thing' what you dont deserve is the rudeness. couples are lovers as well as best friends right? sure everybody gets in fights and it's how well you handle them and conquer that builds relationships, but he shouldnt be making you feel guilty. mebbe talk to your pastor together about this? i know it's hard, but dont let guilt torment you. guilt can be a very large and nasty thing. take care.
A
reader, anonymous, writes (30 November 2006): Well if your Christian beliefs tell you to stay, then you should stay. It's the law right? Can't go to church feeling guilty that you two divorced. It wouldn't be right.
Then again, if you can say "I just don't know", then obviously there are some flaws to the Christian doctrine on marriage eh? At least, what you think the doctrines mean.
Bluntly put, the guy is a total loser. Aside from religious doctrine, all the red lights are on, the alarms wailing for you to get out! My gosh!
In the bible, there are many things said that we shouldn't do, but we do them anyway, mainly out of convenience or self-controlled will. Well, you're human. You have emotions, needs, desires. This guy is not meeting any of your emotions, needs, and desires. It's as simple as that.
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reader, anonymous, writes (30 November 2006): Override your Christian beliefs and get rid of him now. He would drive me mad!!
I think you deserver better and shouldn't have to put up with this CR*P.
Take care
xx
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A
male
reader, anonymous, writes (30 November 2006): Get the best divorce lawyer that you can, and divorce your husband. You've already given him too much of your life (which he does not value a bit).
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