A
female
age
41-50,
*ummy2
writes:I need help!! my husband is 28 years old and im 26 with 2 girls 5 and 6. Ever since we had our children i have raised them by myself because he is so selfish to help with anything. he works in the oil patch so he has a lot of time off. When he's not at work he sleeps untill he feels its time to get up, he never helps with any housework, he yells at the kids if they are in his way of playing video games or whatever hes doing at that time. When i tell him how i feel he says whatever and calls me a baby if i start tearing up. Last night he said he would actually get up with the girls because im sick but morning came the girls got up and he yelled "What the hell do you need, im sleeping". What im asking is how can i get him to understand that he's pushing me away but most of all he's gonna have two girls that are going to hate him later on???
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male
reader, Royofthe Rovers  +, writes (11 April 2007):
 Let him do all of his own cleaning and housework. You take care of the kids and make sure you do your fair share.
Is he using his job as an excuse? Or is he just naturally lazy?
When it comes to his clothes on the floor, the mess he makes, the ironing, the dirty plates; just leave them. If he asks why these things are'nt done explain that however much he does'nt like doing these things neither do you but you do them anyway. Life aint that simple; not when you got a family anyway.
Maybe go away and leave him the kids for a few days, (if you can trust him to do that). He might get an idea of what is entailed in running a house with 2 kids to watch over.
Tell him what sort of example is he setting the kids. If anything your kids wil learn from this and become stronger because of it, but as you say will grow up resenting their father which is not nice. If he loves you he must recognise your feelings. What your are asking is not alot.
This needs to be resolved quickly.
Best of luck with that one..
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