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My husband and I are getting a divorce but he refuses to leave the house, which is in my name. Is there anything I can do?

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Question - (14 August 2014) 6 Answers - (Newest, 14 August 2014)
A female United States age , anonymous writes:

My husband and I have been married for 15 years. Recently we has a huge fight in which he now wants a divorce. He is seeing an attorney who told him to stay in the house in order to receive a share of the money if we have to sell the home. The house is in my name only.

Unfortunately, my husband stays there, sleeps there and eats there,but refuses to speak to me at all.

This situation is really unbearable. Is there anyway to have him move out of the home?

View related questions: divorce, money

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A female reader, Tisha-1 United States +, writes (14 August 2014):

Tisha-1 agony auntWhat's really kind of weird here is that you went from one bad fight to him seeing a divorce attorney. It feels like some steps were missed there, like you figuring out if marriage counseling was an option. The estrangement was so fast and sudden based on the information you gave us.

If you share a computer, stop. Change your passwords on everything today. Assume that he is acting in his own best interests and not yours and get your personal finances in order. Get a safe and put all your personal documents in there.

But honestly, if he's being advised by a divorce attorney then you need to get yourself one as well.

Things that you think might be a good idea at this time may turn out to be a liability for you later, so GET DECENT LEGAL COUNSEL, asap!

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A reader, anonymous, writes (14 August 2014):

Hire yourself a good attorney, and go about your life as you normally do. Go to work, run your errands; and ignore him, just as he is ignoring you.

Your husband is using passive-aggressive behavior to intimidate and rattle you. The silent-treatment is a good way to make people misbehave in retaliation. It is also mental cruelty you might add to your list of complaints. Any misbehavior on your part strengthens his complaints against you. You empower him when you react negatively to this strategy; you also give him confirmation that it is working to force you out of your house. Just be at peace.

Join a yoga class, learn to meditate, and exercise to lower your stress.

Isn't it better he'd just shut-up; than be yelling and showing you his red angry face? There is now peace and quiet, if he is just ignoring you. Take advantage of if.

Even if the house is in your name, most states will divide your assets equally in a divorce. So it is essential you get an attorney who knows how to negotiate, and protect you and your assets.

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A female reader, Tisha-1 United States +, writes (14 August 2014):

Tisha-1 agony auntThis is a great question and one that should be asked of the best divorce attorney you can hire, ASAP.

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A female reader, So_Very_Confused United States +, writes (14 August 2014):

So_Very_Confused agony auntNope his attorney gave him GREAT advice.

If he leaves you have abandonment grounds.

Just get a great attorney and one of you move into the spare room.

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A male reader, olderthandirt  +, writes (14 August 2014):

olderthandirt agony auntYou will have to get a lawyer this is way to complicated to figureout on your own.

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A female reader, Honeypie United States + , writes (14 August 2014):

Honeypie agony auntHighly unlikely unfortunately.

And even IF the house is in YOUR name only, it is part of the marital assets, so yes he CAN "demand" half of the value of house.

My advice GET yourself a lawyer.

And don't cook for him or clean up after him. I can only imagine how horrible this must feel, but legally... there is nothing you can do. And apparently he cares very little about how it makes YOU feel.

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