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My girlfriend gags when she give me a handjob!

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Question - (9 June 2011) 7 Answers - (Newest, 9 June 2011)
A male United States age 36-40, anonymous writes:

hi their this is my problem. My girlfriend has a really bad gag reflex so blow jobs are out of the question witch is cool with me cause i respect and love her. But over the past couple of months she gags when giving me a hand job. And well its putting me right off and have now started doing it alone. Whats going on. I am always clean down their.

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A female reader, justme..x United Kingdom +, writes (9 June 2011):

justme..x agony auntThis may not apply to your girlfriend at all, but I'd like to suggest it just in case :) -

You call her gagging a "reflex". Do you know WHY she gags? Is it purely, as you say, a reflex - like when she goes to the dentist or whatever? Or does she retch at other times, when there's nothing near her mouth, nothing obvious to make her gag?

I may be way off the mark, but I have to throw this in. I have (well, it's not as bad as it used to be) a retching problem but rather than being a *get-that-away-from-my-mouth* reflex, it happens when I'm very nervous or very stressed. I also - although I have several times and i'm happy enough to - get nervous when I'm about to give my boyfriend a handjob, and I often feel I SHOULD, kind of a pressure. So what I'm saying is she might be gagging because she's uncomfortable with what she's doing.

I hope that makes sense. You might think that's complete rubbish which is fine, but I had to offer that viewpoint :)

Anyway, the other posters are quite right, definitely talk to her. Also, try not to be offended, as you said you're clean and everything; don't see it as a reflection on your attractiveness.

Good luck!

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A male reader, anonymous, writes (9 June 2011):

she doesnt like having any contact with pre cum. And gets funny if cum gets on her hand

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A reader, anonymous, writes (9 June 2011):

unlike us guys, many girls don't like touching the male organ with their hands so perhaps she is like that. I hope you are not forcing her to give you handjobs.

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A female reader, chigirl Norway +, writes (9 June 2011):

chigirl agony auntI don't understand this, but I can totally see why it makes you uncomfortable. This is horrible... and why on earth does she get a gag reflex from a hand job? Or a blow job for that matter, unless she tries to take it in too deep.

Talk to her about it? There must be some explanation, or she's got some issues of her own going on. It's not you, trust me. It's her. This isn't normal. Try to talk to her and see if you can get to the bottom of this.

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A female reader, michnuggles Ireland +, writes (9 June 2011):

michnuggles agony auntListen dude, its not your problem, it is HER problem.

You are clean down there, you love and respect her. Thats fantastic!

So the issue is communication here.. How old is she anyway? sounds like you’re describing someone a little younger than you to be honest.

Sit her down and talk to her. Try opening the conversation like. "I want you to listen to me and try not to be offended, and perhaps its something you have been wanting to talk about anyway. The feeling I get is you are somehow put off while we are -trying- to be intimate. Could you help me understand how you feel about this please?".

Best of luck :)

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A male reader, olderthandirt  +, writes (9 June 2011):

olderthandirt agony auntSorry to hear that my friend, not much you can do about that. She's a gagger and that's that. So next time she wants tounge you need to gag.

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A female reader, zebralove Canada +, writes (9 June 2011):

zebralove agony auntI don't think its your fault. Maybe something is bothering her other then the actual action of masturbating. Maybe sit her down and ask if she is feeling ok?

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