A
female
age
30-35,
anonymous
writes:My ex said his his moving on thats fine, so why every few days when he don't hear from me he calls, He has shown himself to be a person that doesn't stick to his word.1) He said his NEVER calling me again, only if its about our daughter because he said i tryed to mess up his relationship....his still calling, and its not just to ask after our daughter, sometimes chit chat, asking me what ive been up too, what iam i doing that day etc.2) He said his NEVER coming to my house again, beacuse we had a massive fight there, guess what his still coming to my house, i did arrange to meet him else where to place.3) He told me his not letting me know whats going on his life ever again, his still telling me about work etc. I told him i don't mind him telling about work etc, but not his love life.Thats just a few eg about whats been happing, i could be hear for ages, my point is he says things but he don't stick to it.Even though we have a child togeter we don't have to be in consent contact, he can speak to when he picks up our daughter thats fine with me, but he has to call all the time.We do get on, but sometimes he likes to push the fact that he has a girlfriend in my face, thats the only time we will argue, as ive told him enough times i don't want to hear about his love life,. At the end off the day he left me, i don't UNDERSTAND why he wants to get a recaction out of me regarding his love life when he knows it UPSETS ME.I feel when he sees me happy, I feel he wants to bring me down....what do you readers think..as ive said we get on good, only when he don't push his relationship in my face.
View related questions:
has a girlfriend Reply to this Question |
Fancy yourself as an agony aunt? Add your answer to this question! A
male
reader, Richard_EMids +, writes (31 August 2007):
 Hi - sounds like he's trying to hurt you. Don't discuss your private life with him, just let him speak to his daughter when he phones. Or let him collect her from the doorstep or at a pre arranged meeting point. He's got his life - you have got yours. Be firm and clear. If this is hard for you, and you easily get drawn into converstaion - write out in advance what you need to say to him.
So for example, when he asks about your day, just respond by referring to your script.
You might find it easier if you agree regular times for him to have your daughter - will save some phone calls
A
female
reader, stem1981 +, writes (31 August 2007):
It sounds to me as if he still holds feelings for you and regrets his decision for leaving. He is trying to make out that he is doing better with out you which sounds like it is quite the opposite. You havent said how long it has been going on for but it sounds quite new. Him asking you what you have been up to is due to him wanting to find out your every mood. The more he knows about you the more sure he is that you are not realy moving on with your life. Everytime you argue with eachother you are showing that you still have a relationship with him. He will feel better that there are still emotions there and that emotions are still rift. You need to make arrangements clear and do not let him get away with anything different. Answer his calls but dont entertain it. Dont tell him much about your life when he asks. He still has a relationship with his child but not you. He is not important in the decisions you make in your life. He cannot deal with you being happy without him and that is why he is bringing you down. You need to show him that you are doing better with out him by getting on with your life and not letting him be apart of it. The minute you do that he will start to crack and thats is when the real feeling s he is experiencing will come out. You say you get along but that sounds like it is the case when he is controlling what you do and know everything about you. He left you, you did not leave him so dont feel guilty about moving on. Hope that helps.
...............................
|
