A
male
age
30-35,
*vilmonkey2010
writes:Hi there all. This is my first major break up, my girlfriend of 3 years recently went to university, i was seeing her every weekend, in till during the week she broke up with me and got with another guy. The way she did it was so awful, i didnt deserve that, I feel like a complete loser and i dont know why i am pinning after her. It just really hurts, fed up of being alone, its been nearly a month and half passed and she tells me she loves this guy. See has only known him for two months.I know i got to move on, but i just want her back so badly!please help!
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broke up, ex girlfriend, move on, university Reply to this Question
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male
reader, eaglepass64  +, writes (12 December 2012):
Your better off without her. No one knows what they really have until it is gone. You will find someone better that deserves you. Thank your lucky stars that it happened before you married. Hope your doing well.
A
male
reader, anonymous, writes (5 December 2010): Listen. take it from me. it happened to me too. my girlfriend left me and started dating a guy less than 2 weeks later. and we had been dating for almost a year. I know how much it sucks. I still love her. The truth is she doesnt give a shit about you anymore. Its so hard to get over something like that, but you have to realize you dont mean a thing to her anymore. You may not have been the best boyfriend. but thats because the perfect boyfriend doesnt exist. You did nothing wrong, she was just trying to find a way out so she could date that other guy. Dont talk to her. forget about her. dont fight with her it just makes it harder on yourself. just let her go. My favorite quote is "I love you. means ill love you till i find someone else."
trust me. you dont want to try to fix things with her. it will only hurt you more, and will make getting over her so much harder.
go out with your friends, have a beer or two and have a good time.
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A
male
reader, evilmonkey2010 +, writes (2 December 2010):
evilmonkey2010 is verified as being by the original poster of the questionhey guys, thanks for the advice.
Im not chasing after her, i didnt do the dirty, she is the loser here not me. No more feeling ill for nothing, plenty more fish in the sea.
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A
male
reader, LovelessAct1 +, writes (30 November 2010):
I can personally say there is no use in chasing after her.
1) It makes you look desperate and foolish
2) She'll see you as a doormat. If she can go and break your heart only to have you crawling back, what does that tell her?
3) Even if she for some reason learns her errors and wants you back, she's already displayed how reckless she is when it comes to your feelings. What's to stop her from walking out again the second another guy comes along?
Believe, I've been in almost the exact same situation. I was with her for about the same length of time and it wasn't until she went to college that she decided she wanted to see other people, even though we had a healthy long-term relationship. I have a feeling its the college environment that tells them that if they are tied down in a relationship, they're missing out on good times.
Do yourself a favor and move on. I know its not easy; I was insanely in love with my ex, even after she broke my heart for another guy... but she doesn't deserve you, at all. You should be treated better and you'd be much better off putting forth your energy into staying healthy, picking up hobbies, keeping up with school work, and most importantly, just living life and being with friends.
I know its tough, but time heals everything, I promise.
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A
male
reader, CaringGuy +, writes (30 November 2010):
Why do you want her back? She's the ultimate failure as a girlfriend. She was with you all that time, then she just dumped you in a bad way and got with another guy. She's useless as a girlfriend. This is the very sort of person you shouldn't be with.
You need to cut contact, and not look back. Everyone goes through crappy break ups at some point - better to get it over and done with now than waste time pining after a girl who was happy to suddenly throw your relationship down the toilet and go with another guy.
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A
female
reader, Moo's Mum  +, writes (30 November 2010):
 You are not a loser dude, she is! I feel your pain and understand why you are pinning after her but under no circumstances should you get back together with her after what she has done. Go with the grief, scream, cry, punch pillows and get it all out and then put yourself back out there and have some fun. Take any lessons you can glean from this experience and grow from it. I promise you there will be someone else out there for you who will treat you as you deserve to be treated. Also keep in your mind that what goes around comes around so she will get her comeupance for her actions. Dont allow yourself to get bitter over this she's not worth it.
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A
reader, anonymous, writes (30 November 2010): Yea man I'm going through the same thing. Except my ex used to slap me around and always accuse me of being interested in other woman. After one argument I found another guy living at her place after 6 days. 4 months later they are still together. On my exs facebook she proclaims her love for her new boyfriend. They seem really happy together.
My advice is, no contact. None. Nada. Nothing. No emails texts phone calls, cyber stalking if you can help it and wish her all the best.
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