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My ex asked me if I was willing to have sex with him but he has a girlfriend

Tagged as: Cheating, Crushes, Friends, Friends with Benefits, The ex-factor, Three is a crowd<< Previous question   Next question >>
Question - (11 December 2013) 2 Answers - (Newest, 20 December 2013)
A female Canada age 30-35, *oloutloudagain writes:

So, there's a lot going on. Me and my ex broke up about 4 months ago. We only dated for about a month in a half but we have been friends for about 4 years prior.

After we broke up i started having feelings for him and I think I love him. So back to my problem.

Yesterday I messaged him to see if he wanted a jacket that I told him that I would give him a couple months ago. Then we started talking more and the conversation started getting really sexual. He asked me if I was willing to have sex with him and I said maybe.

I know he has a girlfriend. What should I do? I know I should tell him he should break up with her before we get involved but I really don't want to intervene. I'm confused and I don't know what to do.

What should I do? And how I come about it? Help!

View related questions: broke up, has a girlfriend, my ex

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A female reader, eyeswideopen United States +, writes (20 December 2013):

eyeswideopen agony auntHaving sex with him will not accomplish what you think you want, that being to get back together. What it WILL do is make you feel bad about cheating on the girlfriend and USED by your Ex, that is if you have any moral compass. Don't go there girlfriend, take the high road.

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A female reader, Honeypie United States + , writes (12 December 2013):

Honeypie agony auntHe know you like him more then a friend and he is trying to take advantage.

What exactly do you think you will accomplish having SEX with him? That he drop the GF and LOVE you forever? Or at least, til he starts having sex with his ex or some random girl.

You are setting yourself up for heart-ache, because IF he cared for you he wouldn't ASK you that. He wouldn't potentially USE you as a hole in the mattress.

If I were you, I give him the jacket and then cut the contact.

First of all friends don't FUCK friends. Second of all if he has a GF, what makes you think you somehow should but in? And thirdly.. HOW would you feel if you were dating a guy and HIS female friend told him to DUMP you, so he can have sex with her? Fourthly, HE ONLY wanted to date you a month and a half before he replaced you.. You think it will be different this time?

I so often hear that guys think with their penis, but you, young lady, you are thinking with your twat.

Have some morals, have some values. I have no doubt you KNOW right from wrong. Otherwise you wouldn't ask on DC. Right now though you don't care, because you see a chance to "get" the guy you want back. He isn't going to date you again, he JUST wants a "fwb". Basically he wants a f-buddy.

Sorry, you really need to take a few and THINK.

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