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My cousin is in love with a teacher...

Tagged as: Age differences, Teenage<< Previous question   Next question >>
Question - (3 September 2005) 28 Answers - (Newest, 8 January 2009)
A female , anonymous writes:

My cousin's in love with her teacher... She's a junior high school student and she's in love with her teacher in the same school. I can't stand about this event. I want to inform this to her mother but if I do, her mother will punish her in no doubt. What can I to to get things better?? Seeing with your own teacher is right????

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A female reader, Sick of Being Everybody's Friend Canada +, writes (8 January 2009):

I am a middle-aged woman who fell in love with a female high school teacher 41 years ago; I am still in love with her although she is married but wasn't at the time. She wants nothing to do with me; so I'm respecting her wishes out of love and respect. Believe me, it isn't always a "crush". And time doesn't always heal.

Keep an eye on her and if there isn't any encouragement from the tracher, and he treats her no differently than the other students, don't worry about her. Let her live out her "dream". Chances are, even if she makes inappropriate advances on him, he'll probably turn the situation over to the Guidance Dept.

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A female reader, HellYeah United Kingdom +, writes (7 September 2008):

Hi, look, nothing's ever gonna happen between them. coz i have been in love wiv my gorgeous french teacher (ooh la la) for two years. a lot of people know which is embarrassin, includin my mum. don't tell her mum.

but anyway, even tho i no nothin is eva gonna happen between me nd my teacher, its still good to fantasize. lol. i no my teacher is single and he's only like, about 10 years older than me. i love him so much. 3

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A female reader, anonymous, writes (30 December 2007):

I'm inlove with my english teacher, its pretty crazy though. My friends find it gross but w.e, its not like anything would happen. Its just a crush everyone gets over it. Especially when you need a caculator tell the difference between your age and the teachers....that's pretty bad.

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A male reader, kournikovaohyah United States +, writes (12 July 2007):

tell ur cousin she'll get heart broken.. advice not to get to much involved.. I still love my technology teacher and ive made mistakes by drinking every night to get over the feelings. i did worse things on summer vacations like drugs that could of made me dead. i still will love her and wait pateintly.. well i have myspace www.myspace.com/thinklinux and i have the feeling of i will NEVER find another lover. My teacher is the world to me and i love her to death... somedays i wish i never existed, i have a sad life with no friendships. im writing a book about the relationship, and yah i had her permisson. btw you cant do anything to your cousins heart desire.. she'll do abnormal things BEAWARE, if the teacher doesn't talk....... i will always love my teacher even if shes dead, ill put the flowers on the grave weekly.. and pray. shes seen my huge heart but made no atempt im still lost.. and confused, hope that helps.

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A female reader, anonymous, writes (9 June 2007):

Don't tell her mother. That would be awful. I too am in love with my 'former' teacher. I am in college now, but he and I are still good friends. Believe me, sometimes I question our friendship, but as long as we both know that nothing will become of it, that's all that matters!

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A female reader, anonymous, writes (4 June 2007):

I laughed when I read this! I am in LOVE with my teacher too, and it's so normal. DO NOT tell her mom. So what if she has a crush, so do I. As long as it doesn't go anywhere besides a student/teacher, it's fine:D

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A female reader, Mystic Moo United Kingdom +, writes (15 April 2007):

Mystic Moo agony auntTelling her mum would be a cruel thing to do. She trusted you by telling you and if you were a good cousin and a true friend you would be loyal and not tell. Besides Like most of the people who answer I also love my teacher and I would be really upset if someone told my mum.

And if your cousin says it's love do not under any circumstances insist it's a crush. That annoys a lot of people including myself very much.

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A female reader, anonymous, writes (16 February 2007):

hi omg im in love with my science teacher and i hav no reason why he is married and my frend told him tht ive got a crush on him so embarrasin .i feel disgusted wiv myself bcoz im 14 and he is 37 ewwwww!!!

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A female reader, anonymous, writes (15 February 2007):

i agree, you mustn't tell her mother at all!! think of it,your friend was brave enough to trust you,by telling you this.im also in love with my teacher and i wish all the time of telling him but i know that i never would.so just leave it and dont talk about it to your friend,things might just hopefully fade.i cant even tell anyone about my crush,so she probally doesnt have it as bad as me.so dont worry!!!

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A female reader, anonymous, writes (14 February 2007):

helllo....

yeh i must confessss i'm a chronic fall-in-love-with-your-teacher type but i reckon its common for girls in school to fall for "older" guys. One reason it might hurt her is because its just unrequited love.But i dunno why your all worked up about it enough to tell her mother(which in my opnion is a BIG mastake--its a betrayal of your cousin)

just listen to her when she talks about him and if it gets illegal (in that its started getting physical)then be there as a firm yet loving friend.

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A female reader, anonymous, writes (16 October 2006):

oh for God sakes do not tell! it would be embarassing and there really is no need to. im in love with my teacher. but i know nothing will ever happen so no harm done..same with your cousin.

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A female reader, anonymous, writes (17 March 2006):

well..im inlove with my teacher...very much in love...i found out that i love him when i was in my 1st yr high school...and now,im in 3rd yr and im still in love with him...plus!my mom knows about it...and she's very much supportive...so telling her mom depends on what kind of person her mom is...u know better that me...

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A female reader, anonymous, writes (15 March 2006):

dont worry about it im in love with my scuience teacher but it is forbidden. get over it

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A female reader, anonymous, writes (12 February 2006):

Your cousin probably idolises the teacher and admires them as they probably are a very good teacher. You have to convince your cousin that this is not real and that the teacher is probably in a committed relationship outside of school. Your cousin should find someone her own age. A good teacher will be able to see past this infatuation. Tell your cousin that this is a no go area and she should find someone her own age. A teacher will not take advantage of their position and your cousin should transfer her love to someone who can recipricate these feelings.

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A female reader, anonymous, writes (7 January 2006):

DON'T TELL HER MUM!!

i like my teacher and i would hate my mum to find out, not that i dont trust her, or anything like that, but my mum dislikes this teacher so much, and i would hate her to think of me differently, not that she would do this!

but trust me, just talk to her, don't tell her mum!

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A female reader, anonymous, writes (15 December 2005):

Don't worry, theres no way your cousin and her teacher will get together. you might not be able to stand it, and think it is gross,but it might happen to you one day. i fell in love with my teacher in term 2, and still am in love with him. it is the end of the year, and he isn't my teacher anymore, and it is really depressing. also, one week ago, i saw him with his girlfriend, and the last week i have been really heartbroken about it. the last thing i want to hear, is people telling me to get over him, because i really love him, so i am sure your cousin doesn't want to hear it either. being in love with my teacher, apart from making me feel like shit, actually is a really good experience, and i love it. just give your cousin time, and maybe talk to her about what she likes about her teacher because she will be really happy to talk to you about him. just dont bug her to get over him, because my friend does that, and it makes me really angry. give her time, she will eventually get over him.

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A female reader, anonymous, writes (12 December 2005):

Well in my experience there's this crazy teacher he stalks me every where i go however im not scared of him cuz god is with me so what i am trying to say is that if the teacher is crazy like mine your cousin can end up in problems because most likely if he ask her to like do anything she might be like sure and all those jazzy stuff can happen! so my advise is talk to your cousin make sure she understands what can happen if she and her teacher do develop a relationship and if they do get together or if things get really serious dont tell her mom as yet talk to her again chances are she may not listen to you so go to a responsible adult who u can trust like a school social worker and they will take it from there!

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A female reader, anonymous, writes (19 November 2005):

I think i'm in love with my teacher too. He's really hot and really nice and i don't stop thinking about him. I have told some of my friends and thats alright, but i DO NOT WANT MY MUM TO FIND OUT!!! so don't tell your cousins mum, i know she wouldn't want for her mum to know that she has a crush on her teacher. and dont worry about it. it is completely normal and you would be suprised how many students have crushes on their teachers. She will get over him soon, so please dont worry and dont tell her to get over him, she will get pissed off.

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A female reader, anonymous, writes (16 November 2005):

DO NOT TELL HER PARENTS! Respect her privacy. It's only a crush. She will get over it, but people don't like tattle tales!

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A female reader, daniella +, writes (5 September 2005):

its just a crush nowt to be worried about its not like your cussien is gonner get theis teacher just leave your cus she wil soon get over it and move on

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A male reader, anonymous, writes (4 September 2005):

hi

i do disagree with the what the other persons recomemded as long as nothing happens bettween the student and teacher there is nothing to worry about i mean its only a crush and you carnt help that people in the UK ave crush's and teachers all the time any way wot eva happens i hope it the the right dession

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A male reader, anonymous, writes (4 September 2005):

Hey chill out man, its only a crush it wont last forever no need to tell anybody - did you never have a crush on a teacher when you were at school?

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A female reader, Delila +, writes (3 September 2005):

You are concerned for your cousin. No amount of persuasion will make her stop feeling the way she does. Keep the lines of communication open and do not alienate or embarrass your friend by telling. Keep her feelings secret, she may never trust you again if you let it slip. If the teacher is encouraging your cousin or allowing sexual advances, then you can anonomously write to the head mistress/master of your school and tell them of the teachers behaviour you can protect your cousin by not mentioning her name. He will be fired. You cousin will not be punished. You can stand by her and support her as she moves on.

Delila

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A reader, pops +, writes (3 September 2005):

Tell your mother and father about your cousin, and let them talk to your aunt. And to school officials. Its not unusual for young girls to have crushes on school teachers, nor for boys, for that matter. As long as nothing comes of it, there is no problem. However, if the teacher incourages such a crush in anyway, it is wrong. Let the adults deal with this. You will be helping your cousin in the long run.

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A female reader, anonymous, writes (3 September 2005):

Hi listen my freind was totally in love with the teacher she used to write a notebook on what he had for lunvh where he went, im guessing this inst as serious but whatever you do DONT tell her mum coz she will not forgive you, my guess is its just a crush that got out of had she soon get over it and find a person her own age! if u want to contact me rite back to this xx Ch@z xx

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A female reader, Anastasia Trinidad and Tobago +, writes (3 September 2005):

Anastasia agony auntNO honey it is not. And I think that you should tell her mom. You are looking out for her and that is good. Your foresight into this will save her. Ask yourself if the teacher is encouraging it...if he is not...well maybe you should point it out to him too and let him know that you know what your cousin is feeling. Even is he is stupid enough to consider it...he knows that you know and will think twice.

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A female reader, anonymous, writes (3 September 2005):

talk to your cousin and ask her to lay off the love or there may be big problems i.e the teacher may not be single or older than he looks but whatever you do DONT TATEL TALE or youll be crowned a snitch

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A female reader, anonymous, writes (3 September 2005):

Tell her that a lot of students fall in love with teachers but they never end up having a relationship with them because if they did the teacher would end up in prison for they got caught and someone told the police. Also ask her why she loves her teacher. Then tell her that there's no point of loving a teacher because it's not like the teacher loves her back. She should be in love with someone her age, not a teacher.

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