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My brother's friend.....what should I do?

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Question - (3 August 2011) 1 Answers - (Newest, 3 August 2011)
A female New Zealand age 30-35, anonymous writes:

Say you like your brothers friend and everyone is saying that it was evident that the friend also liked you. Would you contact the guy yourself and get talking to him more, so add him through fb. Or would you ask your brother if he could find out from his friend himself if he liked you?

Because I think if I contact the guy myself, it might be obvious that I like him and I feel that this way I’m doing it behind my brothers back, which will be bad if my brother didn’t know and then the guy tells my brother we’ve been speaking. And also, i wouldn't know how to start speaking to him on fb without it coming off strange or such...

But then if I ask my brother to ask his friend what he thinks of me, at least he is aware and I can just find out simply straight away if his friend does like me or not. It’s just what if the guy doesn’t like me in that way, and then I’d feel embarrassed and wouldn’t know how to react…

I don’t know what I should do?

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A reader, anonymous, writes (3 August 2011):

Personally I wouldn't do anything. It would put your brother in a very awkward position and can ruin the friendship between them. I have seen this happen many times between many different people. It could also affect your relationship between you and your brother. Something you may want to consider before doing anything at all. I was in the position with my best friend and her brother, he liked me and I liked him, but I loved my friend and didn't want to put her in that position, and am very glad that I didn't. I am just saying that you may want to consider how any decision you make can affect your brother as he cares about and his friend as well as your feelings and the possible feelings his friend may have for you. But only you can decide whether the possible risks are worth it.

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