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My boyfriends gets me NOTHING for Christmas, Birthday, Valentines.. NEVER!

Tagged as: Troubled relationships<< Previous question   Next question >>
Question - (23 January 2007) 6 Answers - (Newest, 31 March 2007)
A female United States age 41-50, *ottheone writes:

SHOULD I BE UPSET WHEN MY KIDS FATHER (MY BOYFRIEND)DOESN'T GET ME ANYTHING FOR CHRISTMAS, MOTHERS DAY,VALENTINE DAY..BUT HE GET HIS MOM THINGS

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A female reader, nottheone United States +, writes (31 March 2007):

nottheone is verified as being by the original poster of the question

thank for the imput,everything everyone of u said is true i know it's been a while. i feel it's time for us to go our separate ways when he does things like that or in any other situation when he doesn't put me and the kids first but he really think i'm joking with him huh, what do u think i should do?

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A female reader, anonymous, writes (15 February 2007):

I don't have children with my boyfriend, but we now live together. I buy him things for Valentines, his birthday. He did not buy for me. Well, at least he gave me a card on valentines day. On my birthday, I brought him a piece of birthday cake to his house. We had just started dating.I sort of expected to get a card.

It feels crappy that he did not give. My friends all knew he wouldn't...they all think he is using me.

But it is hard to confront someone. I think it also defeats the purpose of wanting to feel appreciated, if you have to spell it out for the guy and ask for things. I don't share a bank account, so I am not gonna take his money and buy myself anything. I don't agree with that idea either. I can't see that making me feel any better. The idea is to be thought of and loved. I just think true love is hard for most of us to find, and you have to accept the fact that you can't make a person be who they are not. I think we just have selfish men, probably the way they were raised. At least your boyfriend buys for his Mom; I can't even get mine to call his parents, never mind send gifts.

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A reader, anonymous, writes (23 January 2007):

You have been submitting a lot of questions to this website recently, it is obvious you are very unhappy.

Perhaps you should air all these concerns with your partner and see what they say?

It sounds like you need to think about having counseling together if wish to remain with each other because your relationship is clearly not working, is it?

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A female reader, eyeswideopen United States +, writes (23 January 2007):

eyeswideopen agony auntI'll tell you my secret training device...when my husband would forget a birthday, anniversary, etc...I'd buy MYSELF something, something expensive, of course this only works if you share finances but it sure worked for me!

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A female reader, TELLULAH United Kingdom +, writes (23 January 2007):

TELLULAH agony auntHi,

Yes you should be upset.

And im not having a go at you guys, but why is it always the same excuse. Im a man and i forgot, or Im a man we dont do that sort of thing. Im sure there are guys out there who really do value the women that they are with. But its an easy way out, isnt it, to say im a man, thats what you should expect from me. Kick him into touch honey, i presume he is not an idiot, so he must realise this upsets you. Just dont buy him anything and see how he likes living with someone thoughtless.

Best wishes XX

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A female reader, rammsteinfan United States +, writes (23 January 2007):

rammsteinfan agony auntYou have every reason to be upset! One thing I should ask, do you give him gifts (Christmas, Valentines day..ect) If you do, then stop...give him a taste of his own medicine. It might make him stop and think. Most times guys are forgetful, and terrible about remembering birthdays. Also talking to him about this might help!

Love and Hugs

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