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My boyfriend wont talk to me about his feelings or worries any more.....

Tagged as: Troubled relationships<< Previous question   Next question >>
Question - (5 April 2011) 3 Answers - (Newest, 5 April 2011)
A female United Kingdom age 26-29, anonymous writes:

I've been with my boyfriend for Four years and we live together, but he no longer talks to me about his feelings, worries etc anymore.

When we first got together we would talk about anything and everything (We've both had quite turbulent up bringings and although neither of us had previously talked to anyone else about it we found it easy talking to each other)- I know my boyfriend is stressed with work, money and debt and has been for a while so I ask him about it and make it known that I'm here for him and he basically shuts down.

I didnt realise how bad it was until yesterday when I was spring cleaning and found a receipt for GABA tablets (a natural supplement to help anxiety, stress, insomnia and other related issues) dated a year ago, which like with everything he buys online he got sent to his work but kept them there so obviously didnt want them at home incase I found them.

I feel so sad that he hasnt felt he can talk to me about this and I dont know what to do now; do I talk to him about what I found? How do I help him bring down these walls his put up concerning his feelings and go back to how we were? Can a relationship truely work if someone feels this bad and wont talk to their partner?

Thank you for any help.

View related questions: debt, money

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A male reader, yankit United States +, writes (5 April 2011):

Guys DO NOT enjoy talking about their "feelings" as opposed to gals who love to chat on and on about how things make them "feel" Don't worry about it!

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A female reader, hotinlove Canada +, writes (5 April 2011):

I would gently ask about it. Let him know its ok to be stressed and down, but it makes it a lot easier when he could talk about it with you, maybe you could find ways to unwind together? Let him know, his stresses are your stresses too. Its been four years, if he can't talk about it with you, maybe he needs to seek the help of a professional? best of luck!

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A female reader, blonde30s United Kingdom +, writes (5 April 2011):

blonde30s agony auntmaybe the reason why he hasnt talk to you is because he doesnt want to worrie you and feels by putting all his problems onto you he isnt being a grown man. talk to him and let him know its ok to talk over your problems and share things as you care for him and really want to know how he is feeling and if you can help then you are here for him anytime. see what he says to that but dont push him and hopefully in time he will open up more to you.

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