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My boyfriend might have traced my secret account! What if he read a horrible question I asked some time ago?

Tagged as: Troubled relationships, Trust issues<< Previous question   Next question >>
Question - (8 November 2010) 2 Answers - (Newest, 8 November 2010)
A female Chile age 30-35, *issedbeennever writes:

So my issue is very compliacted, about three months ago I started a relationship with an old friend, he's a nice guy, and I like being honest, but he's the kind of guy who doesn't like to know about his girlfiend past or anything (although I had only two bf before him), but kind of gets mad so I try not to touch that topic.

So, my family are very conservative people, so whenever I've had doubts about sexuality, or other issues, in general, I've posted questions in a website. Of course NObody knew I did that...until yesterday :(

I must say I asked a lot of questions in that website, for example, during my previous relationship two "accidents" ocurred, I once threw up one of my pills, and I asked for help and advice there, another time, my then boyfriend and I had an issue when wearing a condom, and several other inoffensive questions that I asked in the PAST.

NOW that I was starting a new relationship, I made an question about birth control,not a big deal.

The thing is that a couple of weeks ago, I went to the ginecologyst for a prescription for pills, a female dr., I went for free because it's part of my university's benefits,and a kind of uncomfortable situation happened, during the appointment, besides giving factual info., the dr. started talking very passionately about certain moral issues (it'd be too long to write everything she said), but that made me feel bad, my family is conservative, so this dr., so I told my current bf about it, the thing is, I had the "incredible" idea to create a post in that website, about what had happened to me, asking for advice and what other people would have reacted like. and since sometimes the site doesn't work well, I took the precaution to copy the text, so I posted my question.

then I looked for interesting things in the net, to take my mind out of my other issue, i found an interesting pictue, my bf was online in msn, I could swear I click "copy" in that interesting pictue, so the in the conversation window of my bf in msn,I click "paste" and pushed enter right away, next thing I knew, I had sent the text that I had posted before!!! I kinda stop breathing for a few seconds, I didn't know what to do, my bf would find out that I had a secret account that I used to ask ALL kinds of questions, which wasn't a big deal, because he knew I had a bf before him, maybe he would get mad about the question I asked during that relation ship, but I wouldn't put up with his anger, because the past is the past you know?

what made me feel scared and way too uncomfortable, was the fact that if he used that piece of text that I accidentally sent him to put in on google and find my account and everything, he might also find anothe question I asked about him, which was about my confusing situation, I know I was very immature and stupid, but I asked about the size of his penis, writing that his was quite smaller than my ex's, and how important that was in a relationship,I also wrote that I didn't feel much pleasure when having sex with him, and that my ex got an erection way faster :( I didn't wrote insults or cruel jokes, I described the situation in a serious way, don't think I'm a bad person, I never NEVER thought he could read that, ever.

I'm so nervous and scared now, I know that would hurt him a lot, I'm so embarrased :( I haven't talked or got in contact with him on msn since I accidentally sent that piece of text, but I'm almost sure he googled it and found something that bothered him because he changed his nisk on msn twice, he seemed very upset, but I know if he read the topic about me throwing a pill, or the condon accident, both with my ex, because he gests about that kind of thing, he shouldn't, but he does...which would not be a big deal, but what if he read about the topic about him? what if he hasn'r read it yet, but he will? how can I find out that? I cannot ask him "hey, so you traced m y secret account, by any chance did you read the topic about the pill, the broken condom, or the size of your penis, or all of them?

Although I think he didn't have any right to trace my account and go through my old posts,his situation is so uncomfortable to me :( seriously, I feel so stupid and exposed, I don't want to hurt him, or that he finds out that I think his penis is little and that I even posted a question about that u.u what should I do? I can't go back in time. and of course I care about him, no matter how tiny his dick is.

Thanks for reading

View related questions: condom, erection, immature, msn, my ex, text, the pill, university

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A male reader, anonymous, writes (8 November 2010):

Being with a woman whose exes had more satisfying penises is bad. Being with a woman who patronizes you and pretends she is fully satisified while remembering her ex the whole time is worse. If I was your BF then I would want to be with someone who really likes me the way I am. There should be a lot of those women for him to find as long as his penis is anywhere in the normal range.

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A reader, anonymous, writes (8 November 2010):

I get a feeling this is all still very new and you're reacting too much. If its an online "secret" account, then I'm sure your name is not on it. Just close that account and all info associated with you would also not show up. And anyway, what are the odds that among a billion people it could only be you?

Stop feeling guilty and stop behaving like a thief. You havent done anything wrong. If he asks u about the stuff that you posted on msn, just tell him that you were just penning your thoughts and you were really disturbed...tell him how this "moral" dilemma was bothering you so much that u decided to write about it and ask him to read it, and then you can say there is this site called "Dear Cupid" that u know of, and you could have both posted this question here. If he says no, tell him.."ok...fine....but I was really upset, and I wanted some non-judgmental advice". Thats it.

Dont even delve into the past...no secret account, no questions, nothing. Let him think this was a one time thing becoz of watever happened now.If he mentions something about the other account(if he knows anything), just deny it but dont get disturbed. Tell him..."are u crazy or wat? Thats not me? How can u even think it is"?

Dont worry. Its not that big a deal.

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