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My boyfriend has a urine fetish. I feel confused about our sex life.

Tagged as: Sex, Teenage<< Previous question   Next question >>
Question - (3 January 2008) 12 Answers - (Newest, 24 May 2011)
A female United States age 26-29, anonymous writes:

Dear Agony Aunts,

This is going to sound so crazy...and I am completely embarassed to ask it but...Well, here it goes. My boyfriend and have been dating for almost a year now and we are very much in love...Also, he and I are highly sexually active. He has been more sexually active with me than any of his past relationships and visa versa...The thing is...I can't believe I'm asking this...He likes me to pee on him!!!!It started out on his feet,then his back and now.......his face.......He never likes to do it to me. Just me to him. I asked him about it but all he said was that anything coming out of me was hot....What does this mean about the way he feels about me?

Why does he like me to do this?!?!?!?! I'm so confused!

-Confused

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A male reader, Llamas rock United States +, writes (24 May 2011):

It means he probably has a fetish for that kind of stuff, something that's not sexual that still turns him on, it's pretty common in men. If he felt comfortable with telling you that than he obviously really likes you, there's nothing to worry about you should do it if he wants you too because it's sexy to him.

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A reader, anonymous, writes (30 November 2009):

Some women have the ability that not many other women do and that is to ejaculate. Most men that have experienced more commonly refer to it as "squirting". Some men love the feel of a woman's *ahem* juices running over him and if they experience this from one women and get with another that cannot ejaculate they will ask them to pee on them and then they use their imagination for the rest. I promise that this is true for at least some men, my husband being one. When I was pregnant I ejaculated the first time for him and he was amazed. It, apparently, was a fantasy he had not told me about. After giving birth, I could no longer ejaculate for him so he started asking me the same thing your boyfriend asked you for the same reason as I stated above. Even if your bf has not experienced this with a past woman, he may have seen it on a porn and be curious. Believe it or not, those kind of porns are a favorite of many men. Hope I helped!

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A reader, anonymous, writes (18 January 2009):

Perhaps he is so unfulfilled and bored by your 'Sex Life'(and, most probably, your face) that he is actually trying to drown himself, in a more Lulz way that usual. Or perhaps he's to poor to own a toilet. Or he could be having a species change and is becoming a dog, and your so frigid he has mistaken you for a lamppost. You never know.

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A male reader, anonymous, writes (30 April 2008):

One of the greatest gifts you can give someone is to fullfull their fantasies in bed. And since this fantasy involves nothing more than him getting a little wet, it certainly does not harm you in any way. My advice is to have some fun with it! I agree agree with your boyfriends notion that anything that comes from YOU is "hot". So don't think of this as a form of deviant humiliation. Instead, look at it this way: When a man ejaculates over a woman, she gets to experience his warm and wet release first hand. But women do not let go in the same way. So men can often be left wanting or curious. So by peeing on him, your boyfriend gets to experience a warm and wet release from you - just like you get from him. And best of all, you can do it on cue!

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A male reader, 17Irish17 United States +, writes (9 March 2008):

You say in your question, "He never likes to do it to me. Just me to him." Does this mean you want to try a Golden Shower too?

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A male reader, anonymous, writes (29 January 2008):

This could be considered normal behavior. And I would guess that he is so comfortable with you that he really loves ERVRYTHING about you, including your pee. So just have fun...and don't stress things....good luck :)

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A reader, anonymous, writes (3 January 2008):

This is verified as being by the original poster of the question

Wow thanks everyone! I feel much better and not as awkward about his love for "golden showers" (although I don't think in this case it brings about may flowers...)Thanks for the quote Dr.Vendetta. You were all very helpful...and although it is a weird fetish, I love him anyways.

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A reader, anonymous, writes (3 January 2008):

Honey, this is just a sexual thing and bears no relation to your guy's emotional feelings for you. For men, sex is a much more physical thing in a relationship than it is for women. It could be that he feels such intimacy between you he wants to expand the barriers X

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A male reader, Dr Vendetta United Kingdom +, writes (3 January 2008):

Dr Vendetta agony auntWelcome to the world of Urolagnia (also known as urophilia or undinism) more commenly knowen as Water sports. Cute eh?

Fetishes are an odd thing. its stuff that turns us on sexually. which could be many things. Boobies, dicks, shoes, feet, watching people having sex. and.. being peed on.

what he thinks and what it means?

well telling someone about their fetish is certain risky business.. you could ahve freaked out and ran a mile and umped him.. so the fact he told you means he has alot of trust for you.

why he likes it..well.. it turns him on. its a sexual thrill. thats basicly it. it turns him on thats why he likes it.

I felt the need to add this in which i took from a fetish site.

"It is generally considered harmless, as the urine of healthy individuals is sterile. However, a small risk exists if there is disease present, or bacterial infection of the urethra. There may also be secondary effects, such as skin rashes in individuals sensitive to urine. HIV can be transmitted in urine."

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A reader, anonymous, writes (3 January 2008):

Lots of guys have weird fetishes and many enjoy and get turned on by what is called a "golden shower." If you are not comfortable doing it you should let him know.

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A female reader, Serinity United States +, writes (3 January 2008):

Serinity agony auntDifferent people have different fetishes. If this is one of his and you want to be with him, then you need to decide now if you can accept this type of fetish. If it's not something that you can deal with then you need to address the issue now. If it's something that turns you on and/or you don't mind doing it, then don't worry about it. It's not for us to judge whether it's "normal" or "freakish" behavior or not. What you two do behind closed doors is your business. And as long as you both enjoy what's going on, then who cares what anyone else thinks? Good luck!

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A reader, anonymous, writes (3 January 2008):

That is unusual! But everyone's different, and maybe he just finds it a turn on.

I don't think it's particularly any feeling he has towards you that encourages it, maybe it's just a sexual fantasy that he has. You musn't mock him for it though, just appreciate that everyone's different. If you dont like doing it, then I think it's important to tell him, but otherwise, he's a guy! I'm sure he thinks much stranger things in secret!

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