A
female
age
51-59,
anonymous
writes:the discussion has come up about my sexual past, now seven months on my boy friend will no stop going on about it. he says that because i have liberal,views on sex that i will cheat on him. it would not even cross my mind. i am really being hen pecked its driving me mad. please can you advise
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female
reader, leanne.od +, writes (19 December 2007):
 it's wrong for your boyfriend to make the assumption that you will cheat just because of your views on sex, you need to explain that cheating is not what will break you up, but it will end because of his constant insecurity and continual worrying.
if he doesn't trust you, then is it really worth staying with someone who is always going to be second guessing where you are and shouldering your every move just becuase he thinks you will cheat. you need to have a relationship where you can breathe, but it doesn't seem like you have this and in the end it will get too much.
talk to him, and make sure he listens, tell him clearly that unless he can accept your views and get past it, and trust you to be faithful and honest then you're going to end the relationship. at least then you will know where you stand.
bets of luck.
A
male
reader, thestormbringer  +, writes (19 December 2007):
Ok, first and foremost, your sexual past is no one's business but your own. That's in an ideal world. In reality, its much harder when you are the one who feels less-than-experienced and maybe jealous or inadequate.
If he can't get himself to a mental place where he can feel safe with you then you will never have a normal relationship.
You can always tell him that if you wanted to cheat or be sexually active with lots of people then you wouldn't be in a committed, monogamous relationship.
If you truly care for this person, or even love him, then ask yourself (and him) why he feels so threatened, and what could you do to make him feel more safe?
Hope this helped. Good luck.
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