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My boyfriend and I aren't very good at holding long conversations. How can I improve this?

Tagged as: Dating, Teenage<< Previous question   Next question >>
Question - (18 July 2010) 4 Answers - (Newest, 19 July 2010)
A female United Kingdom age 26-29, anonymous writes:

me and my boyfriend arent very good at holding long conversations and i dont know how to change that coz i dont want a relationship thats just physical...and isnt meaningful. how can i improve this?

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A reader, anonymous, writes (19 July 2010):

This is verified as being by the original poster of the question

yes we have common interests, we go to the same school? like cliff diving have the same friends but thats not the point! non of you are actually giving me advice on how to hold the convo except RAINOFIRE

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A reader, anonymous, writes (19 July 2010):

This is verified as being by the original poster of the question

yes we have common interests, we go to the same school? like cliff diving have the same friends but thats not the point! non of you are actually giving me advice on how to hold the convo

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A male reader, Griffo Australia +, writes (18 July 2010):

Griffo agony auntThere are two types of love. Love that is chemical and very sexual and exciting called 'Phisical or Chemical Love', this is what bonds people together in a phisical way. It usually is the beginning of a relationship. It gives you that sexual buzz the moment you first lay eyes on the other. However, when the months and years pass if thats the only love you both feel and can express then eventually one or the other or even both of you may begin to part. This form of love is what too many people base there relationships on, thus so high rate of divorce, unwanted children, accidental pregnancy and pain of emotional loss.

The other is 'Effectionate or Intimate Love' needs to also be apart of a relationship, without it, the relationship will never survive. This includes romantic feelings, gestures and the use of unique personality and character traits you both have toward one and other including conversation. If you have this you click really well you are best friends as well as lovers.

If you are lucky to have both of these types of love with the one person you are very lucky, some psychologists would call it your 'matched opposite' books and fary tales will call it your 'soul mate' but firstly you have to understand your true self and what type of person you need and like before you can know who your matched opposite or soul mate is. and you certianly wont have one.

I believe its possible that both you and your boyfriend may have too much in common, education, interests, etc. if you have to many of the same things in common then there is nothing really to talk about, however being a matched opposite also means that you would have some important things in common such as a song or a movie that will bring about conversation. and i mean conversation about the deeper meaning of that song or movie.

Try that and maybe it will help.

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A male reader, RAINORFIRE United States +, writes (18 July 2010):

RAINORFIRE agony auntyour teenagers thats what relationships consist of at your age the Physical.. you dont have bills kids or anything major going on in life school and your relationships are all you got i guess conversation can get a little dull... i would suggest finding activities to do togather walk in the park bowling skating go to some new part of town the mall is always exciting try some new restaurants.. rent some movies youve never seen.. whatever comes to mind.

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