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female
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anonymous
writes: Hi,I'm 18, my boyfriend's 21 and he refuses to have sex with me any more.We have a good relationship but sexually it isn't as good as it used to be.I asked him why he doesn't want sex with me any more, and he said he won't have sex until he becomes obese. He told me that clinically obese people have the best sex lives and insisted he doesn't want me to become obese, just him.My boyfriend also insists that 'obesity is the root of all happiness'.I'm worried about him; how can I talk to him about this issue and get our sex life back?
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female
reader, anonymous, writes (2 October 2006): you really do need to talk to him about this, i dont understand why anyone would want to become obese, not only from the looks point of view also it is health risk, whatever you do do not become obese just for him as there is many problems, ask him if he would consider seeing somebody to talk to them.
good luck
xxx
A
male
reader, anonymous, writes (4 July 2006): I think the asker is a boy who is suffering from obesity and is testing to see if you girls will accept him as he is. Unfortunately I see you have failed his test with flying colors. You sent him the message that you discriminate against people just as you who have excess fat he knows fat is not good and he is probably trying to lose weight but no no no you want it all and you want it now.
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A
female
reader, eye contact +, writes (15 April 2006):
 Obesity is linked to a number of health dangers and even death.sexual activity is limited and strenuous in many cases.it seems that your boyfriend's fixation is not the problem but the symptom of many psychological deeper problems.i would say that is selfish and irrational the fact that he expects you to agree and comply with his request and wishes ignoring your needs and thoughts on the subject.i reckon he should adress this issue with a qualified doctor/therapist.good luck
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A
female
reader, anonymous, writes (13 April 2006): I reckon you ought to tell him that if he is going to be that selfish then you would not have sex with a big sack of lard. Anyways, he wont be attractive once he is obese, which will probably leave him in a state of depression. Once he is in thatstate of depression he will be no fun at all, I reckon you should confront him about it and get a docter involved.Good Luck!
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A
female
reader, lea22dc +, writes (13 April 2006):
Some guys don't know how to express their true feelings. It might be that he just doesn't want to have sex with you for other reasons, or maybe he just want out all together. Look at the tell-tell signs. Do you actually see him taking measures to gain weight, or is he just telling you this? What I've come to learn, is that most men are liars. They lie for no good reason, or sometimes to protect the other person. Just try to read the signs to make sure the issue isn't you.
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A
reader, anonymous, writes (13 April 2006): ROFL - I never used this acronym in all my years computering, but now I did...
You know, that is the biggest load of bull I have ever heard... Hmmm... No not really, but it is a huge load of bull anyhow! I think he either is testing you to see if you will stay together with him if he is a butt nasty lard bag of a man, or I think he has some really really REALLY bad external idiotic influences from people who have absolutely NO CLUE of what it means to be an unhealthy blob with loads of physical and mental problems - not that I'm saying he doesn't have any mental problems.
Excellent choice in a boyfriend Ms. Anonymous... 8X
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A
female
reader, Hopeful +, writes (13 April 2006):
 This guy is either using a really stupid excuse to avoid being with you or he seriously needs some advice and guidance.
I would encourage the both of you to make a visit to your GP and run this theory by him/her. I'm sure they would have something to say on the matter - especially in relation to the health problems that arise out of being obese (strain on the heart, higher risk of diabetes, higher risk of stroke, higher risk of other illness and disease etc).
The thing about enjoying sex more sounds like a bit of myth and even if its true, the risks are not worth it.
I would seriously get him to his GP because if there is more of a physcological issue here, the GP will be able to assist.
As well, perhaps consider some couples counselling in case there are other issues at work here.
Good luck
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A
female
reader, sexseahot  +, writes (12 April 2006):
 Okay, I have never heard of something like this. Where did he hear this information? He definitely needs help. Is he not happy being healthy? Does he not enjoy sex with you as of right now?
Try and seduce him to show him he doesn't need to be obese to have a great sex life. He just needs to put his mind to it, that's all.
Good Luck with this one!
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A
male
reader, d4u04  +, writes (12 April 2006):
 erm, what he's saying realy isn't normal behaviour and I think he needs professional help in the way of councellers, etc... obese people do not have the best sex lives, just because there's more to love doesn't mean its better!! It's in the technique and just relaxing and enjoying it! The only thing him becoming obese will acheive is heart problems and very poor health later in life. You have been warned!
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