A
female
age
30-35,
*irlNeedsHelp
writes:I have been dating my boyfriend for about a month now. He just left to go to cabo, mexico for a spring break trip, but he went with his family and best friend (his best friend is a party type of guy). My boyfriend is not known for cheating but it is spring break and he can drink. His family will allow him to go to a bar and drink with his best friend without them being there. im afraid that his best friend and him will hook-up with some chicks, maybe not have sex but make-out. i don't know what to do? or how to ask him when he get's back if he did cheat on me without accusing him. but still in the back of my head i think: guy + drinking + spring break + party best friend = cheating! Please help me! any advice on how to find out or ask him if he did?thanks
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Fancy yourself as an agony aunt? Add your answer to this question! A
reader, anonymous, writes (11 April 2007): hello!!
The simple answer IS...If he is an honourable guy, then he will not cheat on you. He will miss you loads and wont have any interest in anyone else! The worst thing you can do is let jealousy overrun your relationship. Put it out of your mind and dont ask him THAT question.
Put yourself in his shoes. IF yje situation was reversed and all he did was ask you if you had cheated or been making out with anyone else, you wouldnt feel trusted, would you. You would probably feel that he must have quite a low opinion of you to think you wold cheat.
If he was the cheating type then he would cheat regardless of what you say or do, whether its at spring break or grocery shopping, he would find a way.
The beauty of your relationship is that you have decided you want to be with each other and noone else. You dont need to ask if he has overstepped the boundaries in any way as he would tell you himself if he has but I think it is not likely, so stop thinking the worst.
As far as finding out before he tells you goes, if he is a changed person when he comes back, then you may suspect something is up from his behaviour afterwards. If I were you, I would be as nice and supportive to each other as you can because missing someone is tough and you need to know that your partner feels the same, so let him know you miss him.
Best of luck,
Jamie
A
reader, anonymous, writes (11 April 2007): GirlNeedsHelp, you don't need any help here, except for someone to remind you that separation can be painful. You say he has been your "bf" for a month? Well, he is hardly your property is he? Nor are you his. Is he as concerned about you while he is gone? Do you think he may be in mortal fear that you might "get kissed" by somebody while he is gone? Probably not. And, if you or he is,...so what? It hardly rates up there with "adultery" (wink). He is hardly going to "freak out" in Cabo if his parents are there. And neither is his friend. Relax. You have probably been watching "Girls Gone Wild" too much, and seeing too many Spring Break movies. Cabo is really a pretty laid back place. Not very "wild" at any time. I figure that the beach, ocean, and boating and other neat activities will take up most of his time.
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