A
female
age
18-21,
laplayboystr69
writes:I just got out of a relationship that lasted for well over a year, and I'm not completely over it. I've had my ups and downs as to getting over him, but obviously I have my times when I miss him. Well... I have a best friend, a male best friend, who has been there for me no matter what the situation is. We've been best friends for a couple of years, and we used to spend more time together than me and the ex did. We used to spend so much time together that everyone thought him and I were together. Right now my best friend is in Maryland for school and I'm here in New York. We talk everyday and recently we've been telling each other "I love you" and "I miss you". I have not seen him since I helped him move down to Maryland (2 months ago) for school, and I might be seeing him this weekend. My question is, Is is possible to have feelings for your best friend but not be physically attracted to them? If it came down to it, I think he's a perfect guy.. but I'm just not attracted to him in a sexual/physical way. But I do have feelings... help!
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female
reader, laplayboystr69 +, writes (30 October 2007):
laplayboystr69 is verified as being by the original poster of the question So I'm very pleased with how my visit went.. and the last person who posted a comment anonymously was SO correct =) thank you so much!!
A
female
reader, laplayboystr69 +, writes (26 October 2007):
laplayboystr69 is verified as being by the original poster of the question wow.. that last answer. I don't even know what to say! That's awesome. My father has actually talked to me throughout the past couple years asking me why I'm not dating him.. and I always just say.. because he's my best friend. But his family doesn't believe us when we tell them we're not together.. they think we've been together for the past couple of years. So.. I guess I gotta wait it out and see how I look at him if I do any differently this weekend.
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A
reader, anonymous, writes (26 October 2007): I had to answer because a similar thing happened to me. I was best friends w/a guy since the fifth grade. In high school, it became clear that he was developing strong romantic feelings for me. I did not feel the same at the time, but he just hung in there. I remember having a talk with my mother telling her that I didn't know if he was a boyfriend or a best friend and that I just didn't feel attracted to him. Her response was to say that when I was ready to have a serious relationship I would be very lucky if my boyfriend WAS my best friend. I don't know what happened, but I started seeing him differently after awhile and now I see him as the love of my life and my true soulmate. I know this doesn't happen for everyone, but I thank God that it did for me. I get to marry my best friend. Lucky! Oh and...he totally turns me on in every way. So, who knows? Just keep an open mind. Good luck.
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A
female
reader, laplayboystr69 +, writes (25 October 2007):
laplayboystr69 is verified as being by the original poster of the question AHH! I love everyones answers so far. It has opened my eyes a bit more. I'll have to update everyone on the situation more after this weekend when I see him. But I want to thank everyone for the answers/opinions I have recieved so far.
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A
male
reader, Karlos Omnis +, writes (25 October 2007):
Very possible, you've developed caring feelings for him as you're in close proximity with him.
Do not mistake this from loving feelings, there is a big difference.
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A
female
reader, LovingThatMoment +, writes (25 October 2007):
hey.. im Anissa.. 13 years.
its always possible to have feelings for someone in not a sexual way.. ive felt like this in a similar way.
you dont have to be physical to have feelings for someone. go for what you FEEl is right and move on with whats next in life..
- hope i helped
3 Anissa
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A
female
reader, anonymous, writes (25 October 2007): Ooh, I've been in the exact same situation with my ballroom dancing partner who became a very close friend. Of course you will experience loving feelings for him if he's your best friend and you're that close. Just take some time to think about these feelings though, you're emotionally vulnerable right now. Maybe the fact you don't have physical/sexual attraction to him is nature's way of telling you that you're not supposed to have that kind of relationship with him. I made the mistake of acting on my feeling with my male friend, (we had no physical attarction to each other, either) and we did end up getting together for a little while but we split up because it got weird, it felt like I was getting romantic with my brother which still freaks me out no end. Maybe wait a while until you're thinking a bit more clearly and see what happens.
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