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My best friend got a boyfriend who took over and got obsessive! How should I handle this?

Tagged as: Friends, Gay relationships, Teenage<< Previous question   Next question >>
Question - (22 August 2008) 1 Answers - (Newest, 22 August 2008)
A female United Kingdom, anonymous writes:

I need help. My best friend and i used to spend every day with eachother until he got a boyfriend who took over and became obsessive. I never seen my best friend because he spent all the time with his boyfriend. This really upset me. My best friend said to me that he misses me, he said he was bored of his boyfriend now. They finished but they got back together and agreed to give eachother space/freedom in the relationship. So the day after they decided that me and my best friend were really kean and happy to be seeing eachother for the first time in ages. I slept over at his the next day too. But these past few days he hasn't wanted to spend time with me. He's ignored me on msn and been off with me sometimes. He even put on his msn name that someone else was his best friend. A person who had left him for other people and was ashamed to call him her best friend. I am the one whos been there for him and never left him and always put him first. He isnt speeking on msn at the moment and im always wanting to spend time with him and speek to him and have fun with him so he doesn't get bored of me and leave me again. Im fed up and don't know what to do anymore. What should I do. This is really upsetting me.

View related questions: best friend, got back together, msn

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A female reader, PsyCookie United States +, writes (22 August 2008):

PsyCookie agony auntOh my dear, I feel for you. I've been there.

What you could do is go up to him personally and express all the frustrations that you have about him ignoring you. Doing it online or throught text will never work, he'll just ignore you.

So go up to his house when you think he will be at home and knock on the door. Tell him you want to know why he is ignoring you and that he's doing the exact same thing he did before. Also, tell him that this is hurting you incredibly and that if he keeps on doing this it will hurt both your friendship and you.

If he says that the problem is his boyfriend, then the best thing you could do is to go up to his boyfriend and talk to him. Try to reason with him that you don't want to steal your friend away from him but that you would like from time to time to talk to him since he's your friend. Tell him that you don't want to interfere in their relationship at all and that you only want happiness for your friend.

But if your friend tells you that it's him that decided to stop talking to you for whatever reason, then I have no idea how to help you. This is what happened to me, and to this date I still don't know why my friend decided to stop talking to me. So the best thing you could do if this happens is try to think that your friend had a reason for doing what he's doing and try to get over it. It won't be easy, but not impossible.

Good luck and I hope your problem is solved.

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