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Mom won't let me date a 30 year old guy!

Tagged as: Age differences, Dating, Teenage<< Previous question   Next question >>
Question - (17 October 2008) 19 Answers - (Newest, 1 April 2009)
A female United States age 30-35, anonymous writes:

my mom wont let me date a 30year old. I am 16 years old

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A female reader, anonymous, writes (1 April 2009):

hmmmmm....tell you what..he is 30 and smoking Hot...the sex is gonna be over in a few months and you'll find urself wasted...concentrate on your studies mate...I was 19 and a 30 yr old guy totally ruined me....don go for this...its just the sex and the fact that he is an older man....dont confuse hormones for love...

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A female reader, madchenboi United States +, writes (23 March 2009):

You are 16 years old; and he is 30... its wrong under so many levels. He could be arrested and your family could go through some serious court time. The age of consent is 18... stop seeing the guy and wait until your 18 and then go from there. Please take my advice; I am 17 and started dating a 30 year old seven months ago, my mother has asked me to stop seeing the person and I have. We still communicate through e mail, and we are wanting this relationship; and when I'm 18 we will see where it brings us. Leave it be, if its meant to be then it will work itself out over time; but PLEASE STOP seeing the guy. If you really care you will stop.

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A female reader, confessjess United States +, writes (18 December 2008):

confessjess agony auntIf it is so important to you, you can wait till your 18, if you can't maybe you should look at this situation more clearly.

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A female reader, hazelbanana United States +, writes (27 October 2008):

hazelbanana agony auntyour mom is going by her own experence or someone she knows. most people in sosity totally disagree with it. you ARE 16 so you can date whom ever you want, you just take the chances of him just wanting you for sex. Dont let someone stand in frount of your dreams and hopes and wants. go for it if you want it that bad.

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A male reader, anonymous, writes (19 October 2008):

Because your mother knows that these relationships don't usually work out.

They can, and have before. But the odds of this are almost astronomical.

Seriously, not matter how nice a guy he is... if he trully cared about you at all, he'd back the hell off and let you live your life.

Flynn 24

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A female reader, SirenaBlusera Mexico +, writes (19 October 2008):

SirenaBlusera agony auntWhy isn't this guy interested in a woman his own age?

Sorry, but your mom is right, this guy is almost certainly a pervert.

I know that it's hard, in high school guys my own age seemed really immature, but in two years you'll go to university and there will be literally hundreds, not thousands, of guys to choose from. Hang in there, it's better to wait for someone who's "worth it" than to settle for some perv. :)

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A female reader, anonymous, writes (18 October 2008):

It all depends on where you live! Look up the age of consent laws in your state--google "age of consent" and a wikipedia result should show up with a map including all of the states.

If in your state, you are above or at the age of consent, your mom can't do a thing about it--your relationship, even and especially if it's sexual--would be entirely legal!

However, if you're not of the age of consent in your state, your mom could easily press charges and get him thrown in jail :(

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A female reader, thunderchild United Kingdom +, writes (18 October 2008):

thunderchild agony auntwhat ever is wrong with guys your own age anyway, men never grow up, so it cant be the more mature thing

there is a likely hood if you were to start dating a guy nearly twice your age, you are going to feel it important to grow up to fast

listen your only a kid once! your mums right, she wants to let you be a child for as long as you can cause when you get to my age you will miss the times you would have had!

make the most of today your mums lookin out for you she loves you so respect her judgement! :)

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A female reader, anonymous, writes (17 October 2008):

Your mom's looking out for you. I know you're not happy with her now, but you will be in the future.

From someone who knows.

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A reader, anonymous, writes (17 October 2008):

dont blame her!

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A reader, anonymous, writes (17 October 2008):

Hi babes, I'm 39 and my mum wouldn't let me date a 16 year old, so I guess it works both ways... Let's both find men of our own age. You leave the 30 year olds to me, and I'll leave the 16 year olds to you, that sounds like a fair deal.

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A female reader, eyeswideopen United States +, writes (17 October 2008):

eyeswideopen agony auntHugs to Mom!

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A female reader, aunty_rach United Kingdom +, writes (17 October 2008):

I'm sorry to say but I am with your mum on this one. You should ask yourself what does a 30 year old guy want with a 16 year old!?! sorry honey but it just sounds creepy and he is obviously only after one thing. at 16 you won't really see this in the same sense, i know what it's like to be a 16 year old girl and when u do get in to your 20's you notice how wrong these situations can be also you realise that your parents are normally right. so i suggest you keep to people around your own age group and leave the older guys alone. i'm in my early 20's and i still would not go for someone who is much older then me, i say 25/26 is old enough for me. after all most older guys want to settle down, do u really want to be sitting at home everynight watching tv with an older guy while your friends are out having a good time? this happened to my cousin and yes she eventually saw the light and dumped the older guy, also he was very controlling. so i say leave him be and don't get mixed up with him.

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A male reader, Dr Vendetta United Kingdom +, writes (17 October 2008):

Dr Vendetta agony auntGee, i can't imagn why..

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A reader, anonymous, writes (17 October 2008):

Good for you mom!

Honestly, what do you want me to say!?

But if you really like this guy and he likes you then wait five years. When you are 20 and he is 35 and you still like eachother, then give it a try when you are both more mature and you are legal and know what you want more!

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A reader, anonymous, writes (17 October 2008):

Your mum is a smart lady, feel very grateful that she's not letting you because 10 years down the road you are going to thank her. I don't mean to sound patronizing but this 30 year old needs his ass kicked. Theirs only one thing he wants from you and it's not conversation. Date some nice 16-17 yr old boys instead :)

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A male reader, Everoth United States +, writes (17 October 2008):

Everoth agony aunt This sort of relationship rarely works out very well and your mother is looking out after you whether or not you realize it. This man isn't for you, he is almost twice your age and as a teenager that is WAY too big an age gap. There are good guys your age, don't worry about it. You probably are just infatuated with this man and it will pass.

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A female reader, Tremor Australia +, writes (17 October 2008):

Tremor agony auntI'd be wary of any 30 year old who is willing to date a 16 year old.

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A reader, anonymous, writes (17 October 2008):

Any good mom won't let her 16 year old date a 30 year old! Get over it and date someone your own age. You are jailbait, sweetie, and he could go to jail for dating you.

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