A
female
age
41-50,
anonymous
writes:1) Would a man (being the initiator 90% of the time) keep having sex with a woman if it was bad sex? Bad as in, you couldn't orgasm during the act and had to take care of yourself later, it was too loose, too wet, too sloppy, she was a dead lay. For whatever reason she just wasn't good and you couldn't get into it. If so, would you keep going back? 2) If you were in a relationship for many years and knew how she was sexually, broke up for awhile then had the chance to get back with her again, would you go back to her if you knew the sex was going to bad?I've had this discussion with my boyfriend and he tells me that, no, men wouldn't keep going back to a piece if it was bad. However, he also told me that a man could probably orgasm if he went long enough even if he wasn't into it. He said they would just go through the motions until they got off, also stating if a guy stuck it in a jelly donut he'd probably bust if he kept going long enough. Which does tell me that, yes, men will go back even if it's bad because he could still orgasm.I know there's more to a relationship than just sex and people maintain relationships all the time with people who can't be intimate so I'm not talking about the emotional aspect of it, only the physical. I'm just curious as to how many men will actually keep going back and initiating sex with someone if it isn't good. Share your thoughts and experiences please.
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male
reader, lifesgreat +, writes (16 December 2014):
pretty much the same outcome ... so it doesn't matter.
But if a case of what you said that I would have to finish myself of afterwards .. then I wouldn't see the point of going back for it .
A
female
reader, anonymous, writes (16 December 2014): I heard a quote once that bad sex is like cold pizza. Even when it's bad, it's good.
I don't know, put yourself in that scenario but reversed. If you had sex with a guy and it sucked, would you go back for seconds? Probably not on purpose. You'd look elsewhere. But then add a few drinks in the mix, feeling lonely but frisky and this guy being the only one available for sex. Loneliness, alcohol and hormones often lead people to make irrational decisions.
So yeah a guy would probably have sex again with someone who sucks in bed. But probably not something he'd plan or anything. But serendipitously.
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A
reader, anonymous, writes (16 December 2014): Not all men get a lot of choice in the matter. I only had three partners before I met my wife, and only with one of them was the sex spectacular (unfortunately it was the only thing in the relationship that worked). And believe me, sex is the last reason I stay with my wife.
Maybe things are different now -- I have a brother about 20 years younger than me who has literally had dozens of women. But not all of us are so 'blessed' with choice -- we take what we can get.
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A
female
reader, Honeypie  + ♥, writes (15 December 2014):
 Women do it ALL the time, and have for centuries, so why not men? There is more to it then just the sex, the familiarity, the nurturing, the caring, not wanting to be alone and for some.. the financial aspect.
I think generally, if the sex is bad, other things will start to fall apart too.
Society is so focused on SEX these days that I think the probability is most men would go elsewhere. IF he has no ties to her? No kids, shared friend/family?
But.. with that said... Isn't the guy you mention a piss poor lover if he can't get HER into the act? I mean if she just lays dead like a dead fish, you can't tell me she is enjoying what's going on... Isn't SHE settling for crappy sex?
SEX - like so many other things is two way street.
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A
female
reader, RubyBirtle +, writes (15 December 2014):
I think some men will continue to have sex with a woman when the sex is unsatisfactory because sometimes bad sex is better than no sex. These kind of guys don't tend to hang around too long though, they disappear quickly enough when someone else takes their fancy and then reappear again during a dry spell. They usually make sporadic contact only.
I think its less usual for a guy to want to go back into a proper relationship with a woman he didn't have satisfying sex with unless the woman has other inducements to offer e.g. love, companionship, money, property, help with career prospects, someone to shoulder problems, an emotional punching bag but I'm sure it does happen.
I don't agree with your boyfriends opinion that all guys could achieve orgasm eventually if they just keep at it. Plenty of guys have erectile dysfunction or take medications that effect libido or have an alcohol or drug addiction or a porn addiction. Even if a guy could keep going at indefinitely - I doubt his partner could if it really takes that long. I once had a (very short-lived) boyfriend who was at it for 4 hours once until I asked him to stop (because I'd stopped enjoying it 3 hours ago) I found out later he had a drug problem.
And for some guys with (or without) sexual problems who truly love their partners, sex is an expression of love rather than an act leading to orgasm.
What makes you ask?
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