New here? Register in under one minute   Already a member? Login244945 questions, 1084256 answers  

  DearCupid.ORG relationship advice
  Got a relationship, dating, love or sex question? Ask for help!Search
 New Questions Answers . Most Discussed Viewed . Unanswered . Followups . Forums . Top agony aunts . About Us .  Articles  . Sitemap

Men, do you dislike it if a partner doesn't orgasm?

Tagged as: Sex<< Previous question   Next question >>
Question - (1 July 2010) 8 Answers - (Newest, 2 July 2010)
A age 30-35, anonymous writes:

This is a question for the Male readers.

When you are with a woman do you try to make her orgasm? If she doesn't orgasm how do you feel?

View related questions: orgasm

<-- Rate this Question

Reply to this Question


Share

Fancy yourself as an agony aunt? Add your answer to this question!

A male reader, daletom United States +, writes (2 July 2010):

I think most MEN (BOYS may be different) get a LOT of both pleasure and satisfaction from their partner's orgasm. And, they will work to make it happen. I certainly recall the mental, emotional, and physical intensity of my wife and I trading virginity (I took hers, and she got mine in return) on our wedding night - but an almost equal memory is the time, a few months before our wedding, when she had her very first orgasm with her thighs wrapped around my ears.

It took us a few weeks of marriage to figure out how to give her orgasms on a regular basis (the keys were letting her control the pace of lovemaking, she decided when the penetration happened, and we usually started the intercourse with her on top). I felt a little insulted the first time she said, "Enjoy me - this time is all for you.".

The process of orgasm varies among individuals and from time to time with the same partner. Consequently, guys don't automatically know what you're feeling, or what to do for your pleasure. It takes some experience to learn your partner's preferences, and how to "read" her feedback. You can help a LOT in that process by being a little more direct and obvious. Tell him what you'd like him to do, or move his hands (or other body parts) to where you want them. Discuss and develop the skill of "mirroring" each other, as a way to show him what you want (and, to demonstrate your concern for his pleasure by responding to his requests).

And one final note: Perhaps the worst thing you can do with most guys is to fake an orgasm.

<-- Rate this answer

A male reader, anonymous, writes (1 July 2010):

My general rule is "she cums first". Sex is so much better when she's writhing from an orgasm. In fact, I have cum just from hearing her cum. I also last a long time, so I usually get women off first. In teh event I am with a woman who doesn't orgasm easily, I try my damndest, and if she doesn't, I just blow. I feel like it wasn't good sex for her if she doesn't cum.

Taht said, the partner I am with now has had (she tells me) 4 lovers before her (I suspect a few more), and none of them made her cum....so I am technically the first. She does not cum from sex, only oral or manual, so this is possible, because it sounds like most of these guys never tried to make her cum, and if they did, she wasn't comfortable enough to let it happen. But I think she has evolved into not requiring orgasms...she likes penetration and rough sex more it seems. Everuone is different.

<-- Rate this answer

...............................   

A male reader, anonymous, writes (1 July 2010):

There are two types of ogasms in the world...the real one and the fake one...and men's take is it doens't matter... :D

<-- Rate this answer

...............................   

A male reader, C. Grant Canada +, writes (1 July 2010):

C. Grant agony auntI would enjoy the whole experience a very great deal more if she has at least one orgasm. And I'm willing to do pretty much anything she likes to help things along.

But -- ultimately a woman is responsible for her orgasm. If she won't tell me what works for her (or what doesn't work for her), if she won't give me any guidance, and if she won't relax and let the moment wash over her, there isn't much I can do. Even in long-term relationships we're not mind readers.

<-- Rate this answer

...............................   

A male reader, dirtball United States +, writes (1 July 2010):

dirtball agony auntI'd have to go with the lame "it depends" answer. Personally, I try to always give my partner an orgasm. However, I've been with a couple of girls who had trouble with orgasms. If they came, they would get dry, and sex would become painful. Even with lube, it didn't really help. I've also been with girls who could have multiple orgasms. So unfortunately, it really depends on the person. I'll definitely always give it my all. I would also prefer to know if she didn't orgasm, because then I know what I'm doing isn't working for her. Like Teddy said, communication is key.

<-- Rate this answer

...............................   

A male reader, anonymous, writes (1 July 2010):

My purpose for having sex with my lover is to give her orgasm. I believe in "ladies first" and deliver the first orally or manually and then follow up with intercourse. If she does not reach the first (hasn't happened yet) there is none for me by choice.

<-- Rate this answer

...............................   

A male reader, chocolateTeddy United States +, writes (1 July 2010):

chocolateTeddy agony auntI personally put the one I am with first. guys can cum too easily. I try my best to make her orgasm atleast once before I get anywhere near my climax. If I find out later she didnt i get really upset. I believe in communication and when it comes to sex communication is key no matter how harsh the truth my be.

And if I guy really cares about you. he would generally try his best to keep you satisfed that or hes totally cluessless or dumb

<-- Rate this answer

...............................   

A reader, anonymous, writes (1 July 2010):

I think that men dislike it when you fake an orgasm. If you don't get one keep on trying but don't ever fake it.

NightFairy

<-- Rate this answer

...............................   

Add your answer to the question "Men, do you dislike it if a partner doesn't orgasm?"

Already have an account? Login first
Don't have an account? Register in under one minute and get your own agony aunt column - recommended!

All Content Copyright (C) DearCupid.ORG 2004-2008 - we actively monitor for copyright theft

0.0312611000008474!