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Me, his ex wife and this other woman -all want him! Am I crazy to keep dating him?

Tagged as: Cheating, Dating<< Previous question   Next question >>
Question - (31 January 2007) 3 Answers - (Newest, 21 July 2007)
A female United States age 36-40, *micrazy writes:

I started having an affair two years ago with my husbands cousin. He was married too. It was supposed to be just friends with benefits since we were both unhappy but, then i started having feelings for him and he said he did for me too. He said that he really wanted to be with me but could not leave her. Well she left him this summer and was staying with a girl she met. They ended up getting back together. She left him again after christmas. So now he has started seeing the girl she was staying with. He says he can't be with me because it would be to complicated. He thinks the whole family would hate him. So he wants to still see me secretly and date this other girl. And now his ex-wife is wanting to get back with him, so he says that he is confused and doesn't know which one of us to be with. He says he's not being a player since he is being honest with me and telling me whats going on. But, who know what he is telling the other two. His wife does not know about us. But he did tell this new girl of our affair but he tells her we are just friends now.I guess I want to know if I am crazy for wanting to stay in this situation and do what he wants.

View related questions: affair, christmas, cousin, ex-wife, friend with benefits, his ex, player

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A female reader, anonymous, writes (21 July 2007):

wow. love stinks, especially with a three timing man. i hope you can summon up the courage to move on. it may hurt for a good while, but you can do it. having your dignity back is good for the soul!

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A female reader, AskEve United Kingdom +, writes (31 January 2007):

AskEve agony auntThe answer to your question is YES, you ARE crazy for wanting to stay in this situation. Stop being so selfish and think of your husband for a change! How do you feel if he got wind of any of this (and he might as this cousin has already told his girlfriend it went on.) You're playing with fire here. This cousin isn't worth it, he's so insecure he doesn't know who to choose??? YOU shouldn't even be IN the equation!!!

I suggest you hold on to what you already have and work at putting the spice back into your marriage. This cousin is too sensitive and needs to assert himself big time! In my opinion you've had a lucky escape. Make it up to your husband who is the real one I feel sorry for in all this mess!


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A female reader, eyeswideopen United States +, writes (31 January 2007):

eyeswideopen agony auntHe's a player whether he's honest with you or not (I highly doubt this anyway) and yes you are crazy to stay in this situation and put up with all his nonsense. Get focused on your marriage, if you aren't happy then get out of it, just try to behave with some class and do the right thing.

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