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Love? Infatuation? Lust? Help me!

Tagged as: Dating, Love stories<< Previous question   Next question >>
Question - (30 June 2010) 2 Answers - (Newest, 6 July 2010)
A male Australia age 30-35, anonymous writes:

Hi,

I am studying in college and I have a problem. I am attracted to a teaching assistant in my college.

She is 23 and very beautiful and has a great body. I know she likes me as we have talked a lot and sometimes when I have flirted with her and she did not mind and also flirted back. I have given her hints that I am attracted to her. Sometimes I feel that I just want to have sex with her. Sometimes I feel I really care for her. When she talks to me about her problem, I cant rest until I help her in solving her problem. My friends tell me it is just infatuation and i should just have sex with her and get over with it.

I want to know the following

1)Am I in love with her or is it infatuation.

2)Would a relationship with her be a problem.

3)If I wanna have sex with her, how do I ask her.

4)If I am in love with her, how do I tell her and what do I do?

I always think of her, find excuses to talk to her, dream of her. Cant get her out of my mind.

Please help me.

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A female reader, loraemoon United Kingdom +, writes (6 July 2010):

loraemoon agony aunti think your just infatuated with her maybe because sheis there for you as a good friend as well as a teaching assistant,i think your reading to much into this i think you should try and cool it a bit to be honest,

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A reader, anonymous, writes (2 July 2010):

I've always found that exploration is the only way we get answers, so I say go for it! She sounds great, and even if it is just an infatuation, it's not like you're proposing. I would wait til the end of the semester though, little to risky during.

My one disclaimer has to do with bullet number 4 of your question... I don't think you've known her that long, and you don't have a true relationship with her yet, so you cannot say you're in love with her just yet. You have no clue what she's like in a serious relationship, and there may be a lot about her you do not know. Do NOT rush into love, because at this stage it's probably just a crush. Love is a much deeper emotion that takes months, sometimes years of cultivation... It doesn't show up after one or two conversations. So be careful with the L word.

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