New here? Register in under one minute   Already a member? Login244964 questions, 1084314 answers  

  DearCupid.ORG relationship advice
  Got a relationship, dating, love or sex question? Ask for help!Search
 New Questions Answers . Most Discussed Viewed . Unanswered . Followups . Forums . Top agony aunts . About Us .  Articles  . Sitemap

Live In Landlord is being a PAIN. Should I have a word?

Tagged as: Troubled relationships<< Previous question   Next question >>
Question - (10 October 2016) 4 Answers - (Newest, 11 October 2016)
A female United Kingdom age 26-29, anonymous writes:

I'm applying for my Masters after working a temp job to save for one year, although I don't know where I will be next September yet I'm staying a bit longer in my current city. As my old landlord had family members moving into my place, I found a short term room for a few months. I know from the site it was on the place has been on the market for a while, although it's cheap it's not in a great area.

The (foreign) live in landlord is proving to be a massive pain quite frankly. I have never had problems with previous rentals, obviously pay the rent etc. but he and his wife share the flat with me and are very nosy and fussy. They had a previous tenant who was part time in another room due to her studies, they gossiped to me about her being "annoying" and "weird" because she wanted the room part time instead of full time (I spoke to her and she seemed fine!). After hearing a few loud arguments between then she hasn't been here for a few weeks so I'm guessing she got fed up and left. I am tidy but they are too fussy about cleanliness and stuff, in the first few weeks they would even do stuff like come and tell me to preheat the oven!

I have told them numerous times including before signing the contract I'm applying for my Masters! So I am out at the library or with my friends some days, others I am at home. I can sense the landlord is unhappy about this (he works from home also, and his wife is a housewife) because he and/or his wife often come into the kitchen and ask nosy questions like "You cook?" (as though they dont want me in the kitchen!) "When are you getting a job", "do you have a Masters place yet", "were you born in the UK", etc. (Obviously I pay my rent on time!) They have told me very pointedly "we like people who are busy" and maybe it's a language difference but I also got the impression from how they talked about the previous tenant they are busy bodies and trouble.

They are also Muslim and I am not, I explained this to them before I signed and asked very clearly do you have a problem. He said no. (I don't even eat pork, go drinking/partying, wear my shoes in the house etc.) However, over the past couple of days whenever I have been in the kitchen and the landlord needs to get to the bathroom (which you can only get to through the kitchen) he will stomp around and huff while going through or something as though he would rather I weren't there. I am aware there are cultural differences, but he has also come and started asking me questions (as above) when I am alone cooking in the kitchen so it comes off as stupid and passive aggressiveness! Not to mention they advertised for a FEMALE tenant and have no right to throw strops if I am studying from home one day, I don't even use the living room but I am paying for the kitchen on top of everything else.

Rant over, I am obviously not staying past the end of my contract but it's difficult to find another place earlier at short notice. I am good friends with my old landlord who has a place going but it may not be till November/December. I can leave with one month's notice.

In any case I can't move immediately so tips on what to do till then? Have a word?

View related questions: cheap, muslim

<-- Rate this Question

Reply to this Question


Share

Fancy yourself as an agony aunt? Add your answer to this question!

A reader, anonymous, writes (11 October 2016):

Be sure you protect all your personal account information and credit cards. Don't leave any type of legal documentation or your passport accessible to anyone. Glad you busted them!

<-- Rate this answer

A reader, anonymous, writes (11 October 2016):

This is verified as being by the original poster of the question

Hi, thanks for your replies. I have savings so can move out sooner. After today I am going to do that and start house hunting! It turns out the "landlord" does NOT own the house, in fact he may be illegally subletting. So now I need to keep a close eye on the situation till I move out ASAP.

I went to apply for council tax (idk if you have that in America?) today. The city Council have it on their records that the landlord (or guy I pay money to!) and his wife are "students" hence not liable to pay it, but they are DEFINITELY not students so seem to have lied to avoid it! Whats more they do not appear to own the property, and may be illegally subletting if they haven't asked the actual owner for permission. Council is gonna call him and speak about it. Obviously I have done nothing wrong.

Fortunately I have a contract which the Council has a copy of and they also know what he is up to now, the lady was very sympathetic and I told her about his behaviour. So they can help if he starts being more trouble. He is always in too and his wife only works part time, I wondered about this but I just found from Google he owns his own home run business. And because the records are public I discovered he is in very bad financial straits, he barely makes £5k a year and owes about £15k to creditors. He is lying on the company page too too - there are obvious fake reviews written by him!

<-- Rate this answer

...............................   

A reader, anonymous, writes (11 October 2016):

Hang-in there, baby! You'll be wasting your breath telling the landlords how to run their house. Ignore personal questions and politely smile them away. I would make it a habit to get-up early, cook your meals, and leave the room as soon as he or she appears.

I think your problem is being a little too passive. You feel obligated to answer questions that are clearly none of their business. There are big cultural differences here, and you should have done your homework to decide what you think you can live with. I'm pretty sure they gave you a big rundown of the rules, the Muslim culture requires them to establish what their values and beliefs are. They don't hold back.

They said they had no problem you're not Muslim, because they wanted the money. They had every intention of imposing their will and house-rules on you once you signed on the dotted-line. It's not an apartment. It's their house.

Living in such close quarters would be weird and uncomfortable regardless of cultural differences; and you are more of a roommate than a tenant under the living circumstances. You get in each others way.

Let the lease lapse and look for another place. You should check the campus bulletin boards for other students in your same situation, who are seeking roommates. You can't be too picky when you can't afford better.

<-- Rate this answer

...............................   

A female reader, Honeypie United States + , writes (10 October 2016):

Honeypie agony auntThere are 3 weeks until November, I'd suck it up if I were you and move out as fast as possible.

Some people have no business renting out and you really won't know till you have lived with them/rented from them.

I had a friend who's landlord didn't live in the same apartment, she shared it with 2 other students, but... he would show up unannounced and do "white glove" cleaning inspections, which also included going through her things, trying to claim that going through her underwear draws was necessary.... She told him no and he started being a pain in the ass, so she ended up moving out, and in with me for a month.

So yeah, the rent might sound cheap, but more often than not, you get what you pay for.

This living situation would absolutely annoy the fire out of me and I would be out the door ASAP.

<-- Rate this answer

...............................   

Add your answer to the question "Live In Landlord is being a PAIN. Should I have a word?"

Already have an account? Login first
Don't have an account? Register in under one minute and get your own agony aunt column - recommended!

All Content Copyright (C) DearCupid.ORG 2004-2008 - we actively monitor for copyright theft

0.0312897999974666!