A
male
age
30-35,
anonymous
writes:l'm gay, and he's straight. l have only known him since September, but it feels like l've known him forever. Recently l have developed feelings for him, but l cannot get the courage to tell him, fearing it will obliterate what we have now. I have sent him casual messages, a pat on the back here and there, his hair's a mess so l take care of that. But l get mixed signals. He has invited me to a sleepover, yet he has a gf. l think he knows l'm gay, but his attention was divided at the time. What should l do? Reply to this Question
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male
reader, NightLad +, writes (31 March 2009):
 If the guy is in a relationship, gay or straight, all of your fretting is moot.Falling for a straight guy has happened to most of us. There are so damn many! A good friend of mine fell for a straight buddy once, and although the guy was single, it took my friend about a year to work up the courage to tell him. Because they were so close he actually took the information quite well and let my friend down gently.If the guy is straight, he can’t feel for you what you feel for him. It is just not there. It is better to tell yourself here and now that it won’t come to any happy ending. However, telling him your feelings may be the cathartic experience needed to help you get over them. Otherwise, if they are true feelings and not just a passing crush, they will continue to grow and gnaw at you.If I were you, I’d tell him in an open and non-threatening way. Probably something along the lines of, “Look, you’re a good friend, and I don’t want to freak you out or embarrass you, but I kind of have a crush on you. I know it won’t come to anything, but I just had to get this out because it was really starting to chew at me. We cool?” Short and to the point. No need to draw it out.If, and this is a colossal ‘if’, anything has the potential to happen down the road, you’ve left a door open. But now, like a responsible adult, it is the time to back off and let things cool.I hope this helps. I really feel for you.
A
male
reader, Vahkiti +, writes (30 March 2009):
 I'm... not exactly sure how to tell him. "Oh hi lan, nice facebook video, and oh ya, l want to shag you." XD I'd hate to ruin what we have. l may accept that sleepover offer. l just couldn't live with myself without ever knowing for sure...
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A
male
reader, anonymous, writes (30 March 2009): Lols my "straight" best friend had several girlfriends but he doesn't seem like he was really interested in any of them =| and he used to keep telling me he loved me and all that when we were still talking.....it was nice _ until he totally ruined it.
I'd say.....go ahead tell him? get his attention make him listen! But then again....if he has a gf it doesn't matter _ so still stay friends till maybe smthn happens? lols GL
And lmfao.....we're both from Canada and we're both 16-17 :D what a coincidence xD
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A
male
reader, anonymous, writes (30 March 2009): But that's just it, l have no clue. l feel the "sleepover" is just an excuse, especially when he told me it will be his first. As for his gf, he's not really into her and has stated this many times. l feel... some kind of inseperable connection between us, and we even plan to find an apartment together soon. l think he knows l'm gay, but his attention was devided when l told him.
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A
male
reader, MyDestiny  +, writes (29 March 2009):
 apparently he's straight and has a girlfriend so if you wanted to get with him, itwont happen...but if you want to tell him that you're gay then go ahead, if he's a good friend he wont care what sexuality you are, he just enjoys your company
good luck
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