New here? Register in under one minute   Already a member? Login244945 questions, 1084256 answers  

  DearCupid.ORG relationship advice
  Got a relationship, dating, love or sex question? Ask for help!Search
 New Questions Answers . Most Discussed Viewed . Unanswered . Followups . Forums . Top agony aunts . About Us .  Articles  . Sitemap

I've wanted her for just under 5 years, she's been in a relationship all this time, should I tell her how I feel?

Tagged as: Dating, Friends<< Previous question   Next question >>
Question - (31 December 2007) 1 Answers - (Newest, 31 December 2007)
A male Canada age 30-35, anonymous writes:

A few years ago in high school I met a girl who was wonderful, beautiful, intelligent, etc. We hung with the same crowd so we were friends and spent time together as a group. I guess I developed a crush on her. I always wanted to ask her out or to dance with me at the school dances but I never had a chance because someone else would dance with her first and then, about 5 months after we met, she started dating another guy.

Cut to now, they have been together for four years and though I have had several relationships of my own (none very meaningful) I still have a thing for her. I can't help but mention it sometimes very casually, usually after we have been drinking, I say something like "in high school I thought you were the coolest chick" or "I always wanted to slow dance with you..." or whatever. She doesn't really respond. The last time I said something she got nervous looking and walked over to her boyfriend.

I am now seeing another girl who is pretty and funny and all that, and things are going really well, we have been together for about 3 months. I am in college and everything, having a good time. I don't see her (the one I like) nearly as often as I used to because we go to different schools but whenever I do see her my heart skips a beat and I feel like I just want to kiss her.

Do you think I should tell her how I feel? Or how do I stop feeling this way? It's been about 4.5 years and I just can't help but want her... I just want her... but she is taken... and she seems very happy... I don't know... I feel like I might love her.

View related questions: crush

<-- Rate this Question

Reply to this Question


Share

Fancy yourself as an agony aunt? Add your answer to this question!

A male reader, Dr. John United States +, writes (31 December 2007):

Dr. John agony auntThis one has gotten away I'm afraid.

This has happened to me a couple of different times in my life.

Trust me, the feelings for them have never ever gone away.

The thing you need to do is come to grips with it.

Make yourself realize you can never have her and learn to deal with it.

She is obviously happy in the relationship she is in and I do think it would be inappropriate to try to call her out.

It sounds like you have a friendly relationship with her still yet so if you like I don't see any problem with what you wish would have happened. I would tell her, though, that you are happy that she is happy with who she found.

You never know, they could have a big blow up next week or next month and she will remember what you say to her.

That could be your ticket in. However, be prepared for the fact that she may never ever leave him. Hope this helps. Doc

<-- Rate this answer

Add your answer to the question "I've wanted her for just under 5 years, she's been in a relationship all this time, should I tell her how I feel?"

Already have an account? Login first
Don't have an account? Register in under one minute and get your own agony aunt column - recommended!

All Content Copyright (C) DearCupid.ORG 2004-2008 - we actively monitor for copyright theft

0.0312501000007614!