A
female
age
16-17,
anonymous
writes:i have been a bit forward with my teacher lately i sent him an email saying how much he makes me smile and then another email saying how glad i am i have now got to an A grade in history (he teaches me that) saying how great he was and then he was away on a history trip with sixth form and he wasnt going to be teaching me on the normal tuesday lesson so i sent him a note saying i was going to miss him. he usually is quite forward with me too aswell so its not like i dont have this relationship with him or anything.now though, he has completely backed off from me and has just ignored me for ages and doesnt talk to me unless he has too :( im really upset as he totally showed the signs of liking me(im not reading into this, ask anyone seriously, even other teachers) i dont know what to do am struggling to carry on like this :(please help meby -x-XindistressX-x-
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female
reader, british_girl +, writes (22 May 2008):
 This happened with me too, don't worry, i think everythings ok with me and him now - he was all cold and distant with me, so i presumed that somehow he'd figured out my feelings for him, so i stayed behind one lesson and asked for some help with the work, and he acted completely fine with me! im not sure if everythings back to normal just yet, since i havent seen him for a week, but trust me, just act like a nromal sudent around him and im pretty sure it'll be okay.
mail me if you like xx
A
female
reader, DiovanLestat +, writes (22 May 2008):
 Normal and receptive, behave like the perfect student should do.
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A
reader, anonymous, writes (22 May 2008): This is verified as being by the original poster of the questionthankyou all so much
yes i was planning on just leaving it but should i just be normal or recripricate to ignore him or just not bother ignoring him? thanks everyone!
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A
reader, anonymous, writes (22 May 2008): There's quite a lot of posts on this site from girls with feelings for their teachers, and I'm sure you'll be glad to know that this is normal! Now we've got that cleared, I'm not sure you should have told him this. I know it's just my opinion and I'm sure a lot of people will disagree, but as you have experienced, this only causes unnecessary tension and this is the last thing you need at your age. He's backed off because he is fully aware (and you should be too) that a relationship between the two of you would be illegal - he could lose his job, and even go to jail depending on the circumstances! You say he's normally forward. Well for all we know, he could like you too! But his feelings MUST be hidden, they HAVE to be. He knows this, and doesn't want you to get the wrong impression or feel encouraged in any way. What's best to do now is just to try and leave it. Forget the emails, but don't send him any more concerning your feelings for him. Yes, thank him for doing a great job because teachers love this, but anything regarding love or creating the impression you fancy him, leave out! This won't help, and if he tells other teachers, think how embarrassing it will be! Just try not to pester him and in time he'll start to relax a bit more around you, and not be so nervous and uptight in the classroom or corridor. It's all about time, but no more loving emails honey! Good luck :]
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A
female
reader, missaqua777 +, writes (22 May 2008):
 hi! im in a very similar situation- this is a question i posted:http://www.dearcupid.org/question/hes-older-i-cant-get-him-out-of.html
im not gonna do anything now, if at all. i think it's best to leave it for the moment however much it pangs at me, sometimes we have to make mature responsible decisions to ensure it's better in the long-run to stop hurt and damage for the people involved. see how it goes xxx
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A
female
reader, DiovanLestat +, writes (22 May 2008):
This is good. It is nice that you have told your teacher how much you appreciate him. Teachers allows love to hear this kind of feedback from their students.
Of course you don't have a relationship with him, he is not your friend, he's your teacher and unable to have a relationship with you.
You are one of his students, and he's doing a job for which he gets paid. He has behaved correctly with you. He is used to students falling for him, probably happens al the time. He is ignoring you so you lose your romantic feelings for him. He must be feeling uncomfortable due to the differences in age and power. He probably thinks that he has done something wrong. He dose like you, you are a good student, but he's embarrased that you could think it could be anymore than that. Leave well enough alone, and his behaviour will revert to normal.
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A
female
reader, jabey + ♥, writes (22 May 2008):
what you do not explain in this mail is whether or not you like this teacher purely in a platonic way, or whether you like him as have feelings for him which go beyond friendship.
Now this teacher I| have to congratulate him really is acting professionally. He may have the feeling that you have a crush on him, therefore he does not want to encourage you and I| think that is probally why he has backed off somewhat.
|Im afraid your feelings are normal, and you feel rejected, but i think it is because he cares about you as a person that he is doing this.
|Try not to feel hurt, he is your teacher and to be a close friend is really pushing the boundaries of his job, if you got to close. He is protecting you. You will be fine, just back off to be friendly, but go out and enjopy your youth, meet new people and have fun.xxxx
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A
female
reader, anonymous, writes (22 May 2008): hunny, he probably has backed of because he doesnt want to lose his job or go to jail.
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