A
female
age
30-35,
anonymous
writes:My boyfriend of 1 and a half yrs is very selfish he has been this way the whole time so i knew what i was getting into but i honestly never thought he would choose his friends over my birthday weekend. His friends planned a get together " boys night" during my birthday weekend. It was wen we didnt have my son which is why we could spend the weekend together to go hiking and have a nice dinner etc. And it was planned before boys weekend. Now he is planning behind my back to go. I no this coz its came up on his phone when i was next to him now im questioning why im even with him. Its like wenever smething comes along better i get ditched. He body boards aswell has a full time job and he does gymnastics 2 times a week its like a barely see him and we live together and hav for about a year. I feel like i do all the house and he does nothing. We have separate money aswell and whenever he has none he will be with me but otherwise he wont he will always tell me last minute and change plans all the time. I just think its not worth it anymore. He says he loves me but his actions lately have just hurt me.i just need some advice on if this relationship is even worth it? Has it run its course
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female
reader, anonymous, writes (11 September 2014): The age old adage "actions speak louder than words" is certainly the case here.Anyone can utter the words "I love you" but not everyone truly means it. He probably doesn't know any different. Perhaps his own father wasn't the best role model of how to treat a women? Whatever the reason you're right, he's selfish and to ditch you on a pre planned birthday weekend to be with the "boys" is childish (to be fair, it's your bday and if he wasn't due to be working he shouldn't have made plans for anything other than time with you).It's great he has his hobbies and that you've got separate interests and friends but he's not really invested in this relationship. He's not a single lad and can just jump up and go to boys weekends any more without any notice. I think you're aware this relationship is running it's course. Only you know what's best but go with your gut instinct on this one x
A
female
reader, CindyCares  +, writes (10 September 2014):
 I am afraid so, it has run its course. I guess .. he's just not that into you, alas.
I do not blame him for having a social life and personal interests outside the relationship, that, ro a certain extent, is normal and healthy.
But, he had arranged something with you ( regardless of being yor birthday... ) previously, and he is going to cancel on you because something else came up ?... Then it means : a ) that you are like permanent plan B and b ) that he prefers spending a weekend with his homies to a cozy ( and rare, because of your kid ) romantic weekend with you.
Leave him to his homies then, and go find someone else who appreciates you more.
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A
female
reader, Honeypie  + ♥, writes (10 September 2014):
 Seems like you are an after thought, more than a priority.
Choosing to hang out with buddies on a weekend that you two could spend to yourselves (and it was your b-day too) seems pretty cold to me.
Yea, I would say, enough is enough. He isn't going to change.
Want more for yourself.
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A
male
reader, CMMP +, writes (10 September 2014):
Either accept that this is who he is or find someone you're more compatible with. Otherwise you'll have to get used to feeling like crap.
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