A
female
age
51-59,
anonymous
writes:I met a Turkish man (A bar owner 20 years younger than me on holiday) He tried it on sexually with me but i told him i do not sleep with some one i do not know. Next day he told me he wanted a future with me and wants me to move to Turkey. He said he would give me a job in his bar. I said I could not move to Turkey until my daughter finishes her education in England. He then said I could keep going over to Turkey to see him and build up the relationship. I have only known him for 6 days by just talking whilst in his bar. He said property prices will rise in Turkey in the next few years and now is the time to either buy a plot of land or property. He says he could get property cheaper than a tourist as he has contacts.He would help me buy next time I come to Turkey.This is where the alarm bells ring for me.I am not stupid and no way would I allow anything in his name. I have no capital it is all tied up in my house here in England.He says he has money and is not after mine nor does he want to move to England so I must believe that it is me he likes.He has rung me 2 days after arriving home asking me if I want a future with him. Do turkish(Kurdish)men really decide so quickley they want a woman or is he trying to con me?
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cheap, money, on holiday Reply to this Question |
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female
reader, calea  +, writes (8 September 2009):
i have lived in turkey 6 years and every week i hear the same kind of story as yours.It is a fairytale that turkish men like playing please forget him. for the sake of your heart and your bank book
A
male
reader, silenceofdestiny +, writes (20 June 2009):
I'm a Turkish guy as u can notice from my flag :). Well u said he is quite younger then you just to be realistic it seems it wont work and he is probably after money or visa. I bet he is makin fun of you when hes talking with his friends about you. I worked at tourism industry for summers to finance my collage education and improve my English. I met lotsa people running after older women for money or visa. Most of guys working in entertainment business is mostly after cash or EU citizenship. I'm a Turkish guy but am man of truth so be carefull i dont want anyone hurt and i dont want some jerks make Turkish people name bad. I jope you find right answer.
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A
female
reader, minxer727 +, writes (19 June 2009):
i have lived in turkey for 3 years.. the fact that he has mentioned property and contacts this earlly on is very bad!!ihave watched umpteen plus 20 women just like you get ripped apart financilly and emotionally very quickly in these places....it astounds me just how good these guys are.. turkish or kurdish same cons.
as for the housing market it is good at the moment but better to put money in to high interest turkish bank account on 16% interest while you get to know the country, and look in to the area,s you like... far better to rent.
most guys over 18 are actually married and leave their wives and families hidden away at home. i could go on all night!! but i will say this I HAVE NEVER MET A FAITHFULL TURK IN TOURISM....EVER!!!!NOT 1!!!!!
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A
female
reader, TalkingHelps +, writes (18 May 2009):
 To be honest it sounds like he's using you because he thinks that you're an easy target, walk!
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A
female
reader, Tilki +, writes (17 May 2009):
Visit Islington - or anywhere else in the UK with a Turkish community, if you don't get a second glance there, it begs the question of why Turks in the resorts are so attentive to European women. As a Turk I can tell you that no decent Turkish man would take money from a woman he had just met. Walk.
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A
male
reader, anonymous, writes (14 May 2009): never ever do not believe those bstrs.. I am a Turkish Man live in Antalya, work in tourism industry, see those types thousands of times. Esp. Kurds are pretty good at setting up a con such this. Never ever believe them. Just stay away from them, even do not try one-night stands with those types you can get venerals from them. Believe me not kidding!!!
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A
female
reader, angelwithonewing  +, writes (4 May 2009):
i think you should go with your heart give him a chance u will know just do not give him any money and see how it go good luck
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A
male
reader, anonymous, writes (22 September 2008): well there are alot of turkish men after money and would tell you anything there are very good a sucking you in. but there are some out there that are after a furture i would just be very careful you dont want to end up loseing everything there is some worman out there have lost thousands and some that are very happy with there men just remermber you have a child to think about but good luck
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A
female
reader, anonymous, writes (16 September 2008): i myselfhas had this happended i have been going to turkey for 5 years and this has happened to me on many occasions but now i have found a nice man give them a chance but keep yours eyes open there is some nice men there you just have to work it out i wish you well
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A
female
reader, anonymous, writes (15 September 2008): Honestly, Kurdish men are like the gypsies of the turks.
I don't want to hurt or offend u in anyway but no, i don't believe for one minute that he is sincere in anyway for I do not firmly believe that, that word is in their vaocabulary. U r asking for peoples advice and help on this but even the fact that u have to ask just proves how much of a doubt u have in ur own mind. U have a daughter and a home in England, do not waste life, live it, don't fall for the crap that they throw ur way, do u really believe that within one day of speaking to someone that they could possibly know, I want to spend the rest of my life with this person which is basically what he has asked of u.
I wish u all the best on this topic, he happened to me were I fell in love with a Turkish fella, it will never ever happen again.
Good Luck.
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A
female
reader, duskyrowe +, writes (29 August 2008):
 Steer clear of this Conman!!!
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A
female
reader, anonymous, writes (29 August 2008): Don't go with that man. Drop it.
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A
reader, anonymous, writes (27 August 2008): This is verified as being by the original poster of the questionBy chance I have found a web site called Turkish love rats and think this man is mentioned there.I am awaiting a reply to get on to this forum to find out if this is the same man. If it is he is very bad news as this one has tricked many women and has several women on the go at once and tries to sell a plot of land to you to build a house on.This is exactly what he is trying with me as I initially said I may buy a house in Turkey in the future.
Then the chatting up began. Thanks for all your replies confirming my suspicions.
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A
female
reader, anonymous, writes (27 August 2008): I have been married to a Turk for seven years and we have have our own business here. As per the previous anonymous reply, I am in a position where I know what I'm talking about. I see this situation all the time. Trust me, he is not being honest with you. After knowing you for less than a week, he wants to spend the rest of his life with you! He gave his game away the moment he mentioned property to you. His 'contacts' will be any estate agent or property developer in the area and he will be charging them around 10% commission to 'help' you, a fair amount of money to him! If you want to purchase property in any country, go directly to the professionals. You wouldn't buy a house off of someone you met in a pub in the UK, would you?My advice would be to concentrate on your life in the UK, especially as you still have a child at school. Don't disrupt her life for this man.Some resort workers, as in any country, see single female holiday makers as fair game and will tell you what you want to hear in order to get what they want, be that money or sex. Turkey has some of the most trustworthy and kindest people I have met and I have travelled the world, so don't be put off of coming here but please do not leave your common sense at home!
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A
reader, anonymous, writes (27 August 2008): I happen to have some really good Turkish friends, who I visit a lot. I frequently see older women with young Turkish and Kurdish men on these trips, and I'm afraid to say that my friends (they're guys) see it as a huge joke that these women can be taken for a ride so easily. Sadly, a lot of guys in that part of the world will do this, and it's almost never real love. I'd steer well clear of him, if I were you - it's almost certainly a con.
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A
male
reader, anonymous, writes (27 August 2008): He is a fraud and he has a plan to rip you off. He also wants to get in your pants. This is an experienced and professional opinion not a naive guess. I am in position to know what I am talking about. Btw Turkey is full of awesome men but this man is not amongst them. For God's sake cut off completely with him.
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A
female
reader, Emilysanswers + ♥, writes (26 August 2008):
I think any man who probably chats to hundreds and hundreds of women in a bar every summer and decides he's in love after 6 days is either a nut job or possibly unique.
Keep your relationship long distance and see how he copes with that. Your daughter and her education has to come first.
I would be very very suspicious if I were you.
As Raven Suggests get him to come and stay in a hotel near by and visit you and see if he seems genuine then.
Good Luck!! xx
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A
male
reader, ChiRaven  +, writes (26 August 2008):
 Go really slow. There are far too many stories of western women being victimized by Muslim men to want to rush into anything.
With that said, let me also say that there are just as many stories where such matches have worked out absolutely fabulously. My niece (American), for example, is married to an Algerian Muslim and has been for many years, and they get along extremely well. His family is fond of her, and their children are wonderful. They split their time between New York and a home on the Mediterranean, although he often has to spend more time in New York on business than she and the kids do.
Get to know this guy much better. If he's really interested in you he should be willing to at least visit you in your country and get to know your family and friends. Make it plain to him that if you do become involved with him you will insist on retaining close ties all the time to the folks back home, and the two of you will be expected to visit there regularly. That should not be negotiable.
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