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Is this curfew fair???

Tagged as: Family, Teenage<< Previous question   Next question >>
Question - (12 August 2011) 4 Answers - (Newest, 13 August 2011)
A female Ireland age 30-35, anonymous writes:

My mum drives me crazy!!!!! I'm 19 years old and the youngest in my house and currently unemployed and i still live with my parents. But i still have a curfew. I've started dating a guy and it's embarrassing that I have to be home before 1AM. Like he understands and I kinda understand but i would like a little bit more time with him because we only see each other twice a week and to me every minute counts what should I do to let her know i want to have my own time?

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A female reader, Tyedyedturtle United States +, writes (13 August 2011):

Tyedyedturtle agony auntWell, if your unemployed and you dont mention being in school, I could see why mom is being strict. You need to show responsibility to earn her trust. So try finding a part time job or something to how how you're an adult. Do things around the house to help her out and earn her respect. Then sit down and have a talk with her. Explain your situation and your position diplomatically and respectfully. Though, remember, you're 19 and 1 am is relatively decent. My boyfriend lives at home and is almost 22. His Mom gives him trouble about staying out until 12 and 1. Some parents are just really rigid and strict. It sucks, yes, but sometimes you just have to deal unfortunately.

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A female reader, VSAddict United States +, writes (13 August 2011):

VSAddict agony auntTalk to her and be honest. Tell her that you're an adult, you don't feel a curfew is necessary, and that you can handle yourself. If she doesn't budge, then maybe you could ask your father to talk to her if he's in the picture? If not, then you may just have to settle with this until you can find a place of your own. Or you could ask your mom if you could spend the nights with him on the days you see him. It's only twice a week, so it shouldn't be that big of a deal. But if she doesn't budge, then just deal with it for now until you get your own place or move out.

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A female reader, anonymous, writes (13 August 2011):

Her house her rules, you are over 18 so learn to respect, you dont give money so you cant be independent, her house her rules. If you dont like it get a job and move out.

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A female reader, anonymous, writes (13 August 2011):

Sorry, but if you want your "own time", you'll also have to move out and get your own place. As long as you live at home, your mom has the right to control who comes and goes.

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