A
male
age
18-21,
*dsw
writes:My ex-best friend was a cheater and a liar to his ex girlfriend who is my current Girlfriend who I love and wish to marry one day though he hadnt done anything wrong by me.He had done so much of wrong by her and I and her ex fell in love.Now he is threatening our relationship.Are my actions wrong I did what was right although I should have done it sooner i did it.Im in love now and my ex bestfriend knows now i Left him because he continued to lie and still is today will I get punished for this? have I done something wrong.I know I had a clear conscious and i did right by her and also fell in love with her is this his bad karma.Will I get it back by telling the truth about him and falling in love with her.
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ex girlfriend, fell in love, her ex, his ex, liar, my ex Reply to this Question |
Fancy yourself as an agony aunt? Add your answer to this question! A
female
reader, Lola1  + ♥, writes (4 November 2009):
 Then I do not think you have anything to worry about. There is no immorality in that. Good luck! :-)
A
male
reader, Tdsw +, writes (4 November 2009):
Tdsw is verified as being by the original poster of the questionWhat did you do that makes you question this? While obviously there were good intentions, what was done specifically? Did your current girlfriend cheat on her ex (your ex-best friend) with you(She and I had a very close relationship and told we had feelings but we stopped because it felt wrong at the time but our relationship rekindled and she decided she would break up with him because she was unhappy and he cheated on her several times). Did you blackmail him with pictures of him and another woman?(Oh no I never blackmailed I kept his secrets but i knew he was doing wrong by her and encouraged him to change that never happened he lied to me also thereafter we spoke i told the truth about him to her)which i should have done sooner i regret this. Did you simply encourage her to end her bad relationship and then treat her very well and eventually fall in love?(Yes somewhat i helped her to take a decision.)
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A
female
reader, Lola1 + ♥, writes (4 November 2009):
You have not given enough information to decide whether or not "bad karma" will be involved.
What did you do that makes you question this? While obviously there were good intentions, what was done specifically? Did your current girlfriend cheat on her ex (your ex-best friend) with you? Did you blackmail him with pictures of him and another woman? Did you simply encourage her to end her bad relationship and then treat her very well and eventually fall in love?
As you can see by the spectrum of questions I have asked, appropriate advice related to karma is affected by how you can answer those questions.
I have a gut feeling that at worst, you and the woman who is now your girlfriend probably, at worst, had an affair behind your ex-best friends back.
If this is the worst that you have done, you can repair the karma by being open with your friend about your current relationship (which I presume you have done) and by being aware that cheating, adultery and lying is wrong; and resolving to never do it again.
Of course, I am a Roman Catholic and we believe in the power of forgiveness.
Be good to your woman and live in such a way that allows you a clear conscience, and you will be just fine.
Good luck and enjoy your love!
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A
female
reader, PeanutButter  + ♥, writes (4 November 2009):
 You shouldn't feel bad for having feelings for one another or for being together but I don't think you're in a position to be friends with him anymore and he, rightly so, is upset and angry that his best friend is now with his ex. It is almost one of those unwritten rules. If he was treating her badly then he didn't deserve to be with her, but that doesn't mean that you needed to step into his shoes as soon as you may have. You didn't do anything wrong, you both deserve to be happy, but just be aware that this guy isn't going to just get over it. As much as he might have treated her badly, he's now lost a gf and a best friend and you have lost a best friend and she's in a new relationship, everything is changing and everyone is probably running on high emotion. If you feel threatened by him, i agree, you should call the police because they can be a lot more forth comming with these situations nowadays than ever they were. I wish you lots of luck in the future and hope it all dies down when he finds someone new.
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A
female
reader, Ginalolabridga  + ♥, writes (4 November 2009):
 If you feel threatened by him you can always go to the police!
Gina
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A
male
reader, Tdsw +, writes (4 November 2009):
Tdsw is verified as being by the original poster of the questionWe did have so many things in common he was treating her really bad and we knew we were going far at a point and stopped because I felt like I was betraying him.
But he did not change and continued to treat her badly and one fine day we took the decision of getting together.
He is threatening with breaking our relationship and doing something really destructive.
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A
female
reader, Ginalolabridga + ♥, writes (4 November 2009):
Forget about the Karma that is not what is important right now, and to be honest you did what you thought was right like any decent person would have done.
Enjoy what you have now and forget all about this karma stuff.
Gina
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A
female
reader, FireAndIce  +, writes (4 November 2009):
No love, you did nothing wrong. He may have been your best friend, but that doesn't mean you should sit back and be okay with him lying to and cheating on his girlfriend. She deserves better, and it looks like she found it in you. His behaviour shouldn't have been excused by you just because you were best friends.
But did you get together with her AFTER they broke up? And you didn't say how he's threatening your relationship.
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