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Is there a way to keep him from orgasming too quickly?

Tagged as: Sex<< Previous question   Next question >>
Question - (23 July 2011) 3 Answers - (Newest, 23 July 2011)
A female United States age 41-50, anonymous writes:

Dear readers,

I'm in search of any thoughts, opinions or even similar experiences. I have a "bedroom" question. My boyfriend and i have been having some minor issues in the bedroom. First off let me say this is the man i want to spend the rest of my life with and i am committed to working out any issue or problem that may arise in our relationship. Giving up and living without is not an option, however we have been having some difficulty in the love making department and any advice would be greatly appreciated. my question is... Is there a way to keep him from orgasming too quickly? Our foreplay is amazing and he has no problem making me feel like a woman when we fool around. But once we start having sex it only lasts about 3-5 minutes. And during those few short minutes he has to keep stopping or taking it out in an effort to hold out and not get off too quickly. So i have a hard time even enjoying the few minutes i get because it's stop and go...and to be honest frustrating. It hasnt always been like this, however its never really been much longer. He says it feels so good and he feels like he doesn't have control of it anymore. We love eachother and want more time being intimate. We've just started looking into solutions so any help would be welcomed. Thank you.

View related questions: foreplay, orgasm

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A male reader, anonymous, writes (23 July 2011):

I had this problem at one time, and my doctor prescribed a small dose of Paxil. Paxil is an anti-depressant that has the side effect of delaying or preventing ejaculation, but for guys like me that is a good side effect. It worked perfectly. There are a few other anti-depressants that work the same way.

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A male reader, Roshii United Kingdom +, writes (23 July 2011):

Roshii agony auntHmmm i have a few suggestions, I'm somewhat of a sex guru to friends so i've had a few questions like this before.

First off this is about finding out what works for you both.

sounds like hes really worked up by the time you have sex, so i suggest you try to decrease that by either decreasing the foreplay he receives (if that doesn't help decrease the foreplay altogether for a while). In an effort for him to learn some control.

Second is pacing, Most vital and hardest part to stick to. (its hard to pace nice and slow at first when your all in the moment)

but pace your sex, have him go soft and gentle at first moving slower when he feels closer seeing if he can keep moving but still have control.

(this teachs movement control, so even when your at it (to be blunt) he can carry on moving when he gets closer rather than stopping. )

You could also try taking complete control of the situation sometimes, Playing a game for example where hes not allowed to orgasm until you say he is. So play, be intimate, but have him tell you when hes close when he is stop at first, then push him a little further or closer to orgasm, telling him hes not allowed because you didn't say. You could have a little punishment thing set up so if he orgasms with out permission he has to do that. This type of sex is all about him, and you giving. All he should be doing is waiting for you to tell him he can orgasm or trying not to.

If he says hes going to orgasm tell him he's not and slow down what ever your doing, and build it back up.

My final suggestion is during sex, as he gets close grab the base of his penis firmly, (not to hard) and squeeze it slightly. This reduces the blood flow to the penis thus hindering the sensitivity. (he could also do it him self. but its kinda hard to move and grab your penis in that way.) Hold it for a short while. (his penis should soften slightly) then let go and let him carry on. basically its repeat until satisfied.

I hope that helps if you need anything else feel free to message me

Roshiii

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A male reader, Dasd United Kingdom +, writes (23 July 2011):

I actually had this problem myself, not too long ago, there are ways of lasting longer, is this for him or you? cause if it is for him then tell him to control his breathing, I had to try and find a way to do this because I always kept letting go early because I was not controlling my breathing, and there is more I will give you a link to the website I used, it has techniques for him to last longer and at the same time without stopping the action so to speak and it feels great for you, my girlfriend is a testament to that :), http://www.singlescafe.net/step-down-techniques.html

I hope this works and if it does let me know :) good luck :D

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