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Is she trying to test me? How do I respond? My online Gf sent me two pictures of herself. She wants comment, but one picture is very unflattering.

Tagged as: Big Questions, Dating, Health, Online dating, Trust issues<< Previous question   Next question >>
Question - (23 May 2015) 4 Answers - (Newest, 23 May 2015)
A male India age 26-29, anonymous writes:

I asked my gf to send me her new pictures (of herself).

I met her online.

The problem is she send me two pictures.

One is good and the other one is looking bad. She asked me that how those pictures look, to me.

I'm really scared to say that "that other one is looking bad". I think she is trying to test me. Help to solve this problem.

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A male reader, CMMP United States +, writes (23 May 2015):

My guess is that you've never met in person. I'm also going to assume that if that is true she has, up until now, only shown you the most flattering pictures of her.

So this could be a way to test the waters to see what you think of the way she really looks.

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A female reader, Honeypie United States + , writes (23 May 2015):

Honeypie agony auntI agree with WiseOwlE

If she DOES want to talk about the "BAD" picture point out the nice parts (I'm sure there are some) and avoid the negative critique.

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A reader, anonymous, writes (23 May 2015):

Simple, just say "I like this one the best!" Let her make her own conclusion about the other one. If she asks again what your opinion is, just say " I don't think the other one does you justice."

You said one turned out bad, without explaining how. What was wrong with it?

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A female reader, Abella United States +, writes (23 May 2015):

Abella agony aunthow do you communicate with her? By phone or email or text or a dating site or Skype? Or by all of the above?

If all of the above then any deception is unlikely.

if you have used the phone you have heard her voice. that's a plus.

if you have used Skype then you have seen her face in real time and that is a plus too.

If you are not on Skype then investigate how it works and how to set it up and the cost. If it is a possibility then raise this possibility with her and consider her reaction to this suggestion.

now on to the photos.

yes she may be testing you.

however, depending on some other factors there may be a problem.

if you never hear her voice and never see her in real time then her age may not be the age you think. she may have sent you photos of when she was younger. but realizing that she is developing strong feelings for you she decided to send you a very recent photo.

we all occasionally have an unflattering photo taken but we do not usually share such photos with others.

however if the photo was just a screwed up silly face that she made at the camera then reply to her re that photo by saying:

"you have a great sense of humour and I love that about you. it really shone out from that photo and I could see that you were having a lot of fun that day"

As far as the more attractive photo - let her know that there is only room on your bedside table for one photo beside your bed and when you found a photo frame that was just the right size. So you put that photo into the frame and now it is the first thing you see when you awake each morning. that you think she is so beautiful.

If the photo looks considerably older than the other photo then stay calm. she may have accidentally put a photo of her Mother in, instead of herself.

so rather than be accusatory about the situation raise the possibility of Skype and discuss that without saying much.

if the photo is not so good ask who took the photo. perhaps it was taken in poor light and so shadows cast make her look older. You can at least, in the circumstances say that you love the look of her hair, that you'd love to see her hair.

then distract the conversation back to Skype options.

The truth of why she has done this will come out eventually.

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