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Is my nudity, inside my own home, in front of my 44 year old stepdaughter, OK or not?

Tagged as: Family, Health, Trust issues<< Previous question   Next question >>
Question - (10 May 2016) 12 Answers - (Newest, 12 May 2016)
A male United Kingdom age , anonymous writes:

My wife and I are in our late 60's - just average people except that we like to be nude at home when it is warm enough.

Now my 44 year old step daughter is living with us and strongly objects to me being naked even though it is my house.

Her mother - my wife - seems to be on the side of her daughter and I feel quite upset by this. What is wrong with the body that God gave me?

I am a threat to no one.

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A female reader, Caring Aunty A Australia +, writes (12 May 2016):

Caring Aunty A agony auntI can't get past you having warm days in England, what a treat that must be. Try Australia in summer at my place, we'd all be sitting around dang naked... until family come to stay for holidays. I count the days till they leave.

Just cover up, use some common sense, wear a sarong and put on a fan. No need to show off what keeps your wife happy to the rest of the world – your Step-daughter :)

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A female reader, Dionee' South Africa +, writes (12 May 2016):

Dionee' agony auntI think that its inappropriate being nude in front of your step daughter. No one is denying that it is your home as we all know that it indeed is BUT there are certain behavioural patterns that are acceptable and there are those that aren't. Quite frankly, if any guy that was a father figure to me roamed around the house nude, I'd be put off! Pissed even. It's just not something that is wanted so why force your beliefs on others? why not just be nude in the confines of your bedroom? and leave it at that? No one is saying that you cannot go nude, it's a question of when, where and in front of whom. Be considerate of others OP.

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A female reader, jls022 United Kingdom +, writes (12 May 2016):

It doesn't have to be a threat to her though OP, people can simply feel uncomfortable with certain behaviours. What I don't get is why you are still so keen to be nude knowing fine well that it makes your wife and stepdaughter uncomfortable? I'd be mortified if I thought something I was doing made someone feel like that and I'd stop it immediately.

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A female reader, chigirl Norway +, writes (11 May 2016):

chigirl agony auntYes, it's your own home, but we still don't live alone in the world. You will get further ahead with happiness and general easiness of life if you consider the other people who live with you in this world.

I agree that walking around in the nude isn't something terrible, or wrong in any way. But it's called nudism for a reason, and they have nudist beaches and resorts for a reason too. That reason is: not everyone else wants to see your earthly flesh on display. They find it uncomfortable. They don't agree with the life style. For whatever reasons, it makes them UNCOMFORTABLE.

So, while she is living with you, put a pair of briefs on at least. I mean, she is a guest at your house, and when you have other guests over you normally do put clothes on, don't you? She's not a permanent resident who agreed to this life style. She's just a guest, and hopefully she will be on her way to her own home soon enough.

In the meantime, do a google search and see if you cant find a nice resort near you where you are allowed to get comfortable. Or, see if your daughter in law wouldn't mind leaving the house on those warm days, and let you know in advance when she is returning, so that you can be comfortable without making her uncomfortable.

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A female reader, So_Very_Confused United States +, writes (11 May 2016):

So_Very_Confused agony auntPersonally I would not want to sit on a communal couch after someone has sat on it butt naked.

Do you answer the front door naked? why or why not?

Yes god gave you this body.

he also gave you a brain and common sense and a desire to please others.... this does not please YOUR WIFE...the woman you promised to honor and respect. THIS is disrespecting your wife's wishes. How are your desires more important than your wife's?

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A female reader, CindyCares Italy +, writes (11 May 2016):

CindyCares agony aunt As for that , I am sure that you will agree that God has also made your digestive and excretive system ( and what a brilliant masterpiece of chemistry and physics it is ! ) :

But , when you are in your own home, do you go in your own living room, lower your pants, and take a dump on the rug in front of any guests you can have ?

I would think, no you don't.

The simple fact is that you may also be in your own home but you don't get to make rules for teh rest of society at large. The rule in your country says that you can expose your nudity only in an appropriate context to other consenting adults. It's THEIR choice, and if your stepdaughter feels that yes, you are a threat, to her sense of decorum , level of psychological comfort and physical boundaries, then end of story. Do you realize that if you insist in dangling your schlong under her nose once she had made quite clear she does not want that, she could have you charged for indecent exposure ?!

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A male reader, anonymous, writes (11 May 2016):

But can someone just explain the reasoning behind the human body - created by God in my view - and in His likeness - can be considered 'gross' in one's own home? We're not talking abouut any form of sexual activity or about being in a public place, or at Walmart. We know that 95% of the world's population would agree but why? Does anyone actually think about this? Is it not just that people are ashamed of what they look like? There is absolutely no threat that I can understand.

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A female reader, Anonymous 123 Italy +, writes (11 May 2016):

Anonymous 123 agony auntNot to be disrespectful of your beliefs but what you're doing is just absolutely gross and disgusting. If you want to be naked then you do it in the privacy of your own room. You don't go around displaying your private parts to your step daughter and mind you, she's not your own daughter so yes, she CAN see you as a threat.

I know you'll say that it's your house and your rules but that's a very flawed logic when it comes to this. You pay taxes and you are a rightful citizen of your country so does that give you a right to roam around naked on the streets as well because it's too hot outside?

There's nothing wrong with your body or your right to be naked, just don't make others uncomfortable. That isn't your right.

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A female reader, aunt honesty Ireland +, writes (11 May 2016):

aunt honesty agony auntIf you both like to be nude on your own home then good for you. However did you discuss this with your step daughter before she moved in? I can see why she would feel uncomfortable I would feel the same, but it should have been discussed so she knew before she moved in that this is what you and your wife like to do.

If she did no and told you to stop well then that is unfair on you as it is your home and you should be able to do as you please. Talk to your wife about how upset it has made you and maybe find out how long she is planning on living with you. Hopefully it is short term.

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A female reader, Honeypie United States + , writes (10 May 2016):

Honeypie agony auntI don't think it's appropriate. But... it is your house if she doesn't LIKE to see your saggy nuts the daughter can move out and take care of herself.. after all she is 44, not 4.

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A female reader, anonymous, writes (10 May 2016):

If you want to walk around in your birthday suit, you can do that. Go and find yourself a nudist resort and have at it!

I agree with both your wife and step daughter. Your walking around naked is totally inappropriate!

If you want to do this, do it when you are alone or with your wife but never do it in the presence of your step daughter. Or stay confined to one area of the house which is not frequented by anyone else! Problem solved.

Your thought process and actions are pretty selfish if you ask me. Why should they have to be subjected to something they don't like? There is such a thing as good manners, etiquette and compromise.

And yes, your nakedness is a threat to the women you live with. So, suck it up and change your attitude and behaviour.

Majority rules!

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A female reader, anonymous, writes (10 May 2016):

Is your household nudity a surprise to her? Unless you specifically discussed the nudity and that she would be expected to be tolerant of your personal desire to dress as you please in your own home, I would say that you when your wife are in the wrong. Of course as the stepdaughter is 44 years old she's well into adulthood and can always find another place to live. I guess the real question is why didn't you talk about it before she moved in?

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