A
male
age
,
*aringexhusband
writes:I have a dilemma with my ex-wife.We are still friends but I am concerned that she losing her vitality for life. She was full of fun and at her best during our marriage soon after an she had an affair (which I am not supposed to know about). I arrived home a week early from an overseas trip and found her in bed with another man. I had let myself in quietly (as it was 2am) and immediately heard noises in the bedroom. With mixed feelings I glanced in there she was totally lost in lovemaking. It sounds a little kinky, but I watched her climax a few times before leaving quietly. The strange thing was I felt happy for what she was experiencing? I rang her 8am and pretended that I'd just arrived at the airport. I got a great welcome home and the first we did was shower and jump into bed. Here's the interesting part; the sex we had that morning (just a few hours after she'd been with another man) was the best ever! And our marriage was good for another 10 years. Question: Knowing how much sexual activity with another man stimulated her attitude and general wellbeing, is it wrong for me to be trying to secretly organise a blind date for her?
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Fancy yourself as an agony aunt? Add your answer to this question! A
female
reader, Laura1318  +, writes (6 June 2010):
 You would be better off to leave her to her own devices. Stolen kisses are always sweetest.
You will need to pretend and just act along with her.
A
female
reader, Miamine  +, writes (6 June 2010):
 Nope, sounds like your a good friend...
Don't think she'll like a blind date much, but I agree, it sounds like just what she needs.. Divorce is hard on a woman, it can really steal all your confidence.
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A
female
reader, anonymous, writes (6 June 2010): hey if she doesent know u knew about he secret affare tell her it dont help but if i were u i would get in a threesome lol
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A
male
reader, d2001d  +, writes (5 June 2010):
Could you be oversimplifying the sex with another man thing? What women want is companionship (read: someone to listen to them talk) and security. Don't get me wrong friend, but when you walked in on her 10 years ago, she was missing something from your relationship, and then it sounds like you became more turned on by her and thus gave her more love and attention (read: companionship and security).
Now that she is older, she is probably drowning in the thought that she will live out get older years alone. So yes, do find her a good guy. But not for the reasons you presumed.
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A
reader, anonymous, writes (5 June 2010): If it does not disrupt your marriage and if both are you are willing to do it, sure. A lot of couples do this lately. If she consents to it and if you really want to see your wife in bed with someone else, sure why not.
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