A
female
age
41-50,
anonymous
writes:Is it true that if you are not sure if you want to be with someone it means you dont? I am with my current boyfriend and although we get on very well, I am not sure he is the one that I want to settle with. Could these doubts mean that he is not the one for me? Would I be sure if he was? Reply to this Question
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Fancy yourself as an agony aunt? Add your answer to this question! A
reader, anonymous, writes (25 February 2009): It's not always the case that questioning a relationship means you shouldn't be with the person. If you are seeing red flags, though, don't ignore them! Those are signs that perhaps you should move on!
I have been known to ignore red flags, and regretted it in the long run! It takes a lot of soul-searching to be sure a person is the right one. We all make mistakes in life, it's inevitable! But the less we jump into things impulsively, the better the chances of not making so many mistakes...I have learned that from making more than my share of huge mistakes!!!
Good Luck!
A
female
reader, wonderingcat +, writes (25 February 2009):
 Right. Think of our brain cells as a very intelligent and sensitive ever so updated super computer, and our limited knowledge as softwares. The brain cells pick up on things that the software could not process fully, yet the super computer has already started making some analysis. As the hardware and software have yet to be synchronized, you get these "doubts".
Having said that, doubts may also be dispelled (or become clear and thus reaffirmed your initial subconscious thoughts) upon more information that you would obtain as your relationship progresses (or digresses).
At least that was how I explained to myself anyways LOL.
Cat
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A
female
reader, michele21  +, writes (25 February 2009):
 yes you would be sure if he was....everyone always asks how do you know he is the one for you how can you tell...believe me i asked myself that all the freaking time.....well untill i actually found the ONE for me and believe me you will just know....its a unexplainable feeling that you cant describe and believe me you won't have doubts....so i say move on and keep searching you would know if he is the one...hope this helps...good luck
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