A
female
age
30-35,
anonymous
writes:Uhm... I've known a friend since I was 12, and we've been best friends since then. However, during the past year, I've come to realise that I love her more than just a friend. She got a boyfriend six months ago and everytime she mentions him I get really jelous of him etc etc. She's told me she's bi, which I believe is 100% true, because she wouldn't lie to me about something like that. Of course, I too am bi/possibly lesbian.Is it possible to make myself not love her? I'm feeling like its getting out of hand, because like when she mentions her boyfriend, I tend to become angry/irritable and miserable. Thanks in advance for any answers :S
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reader, anonymous, writes (29 December 2010): This is verified as being by the original poster of the questionThank you so much guys, you all really helped 3. Yes, your right in thinking I just want her to be happy, so I'm going to put a cap on my feelings and wait to see what happens. I don't think right now I could tell her how I feel, its unfair since she has a boyfriend.
Thanks again ^^
A
female
reader, onyx95  +, writes (29 December 2010):
im sorry to say that maybe you should hold back. your friend seems happy at the moment with her boyfriend and i like to think that you want whats best for her. even if its hard just keep reminding yourself that shes happy. you care for her more then just a friend but i think right now she has her mind set on him. the truth hurts but you have to face it. and maybe if you fill up to it i think you should tell her. but dont pressure her into breaking up with him. respect how she fills and she will respect how you fill 3
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A
female
reader, janniepeg  +, writes (29 December 2010):
 Your questions implies that you want to stay friends with her and when you can't get her you want her even more. The more angry you get the more she justifies that being with her boyfriend is good for her so you are in a no win situation. You will just be unhappy if you insist that she has to be your friend until she changes her mind or dumps her boyfriend. The only way this can work is if you can accept that her boyfriend will always be her priority, and you don't let your ego get in the way. It's unnatural for us to turn off the love button. It's not that there's something extraordinary about her, it's just that you are at a moment when you are ready for a relationship and she just happens to be there. Love is a state of mind. Jealousy is also a state of mind. You can choose what you are going to do with your feelings. To remain your friendship it's better to get your eyes on someone else, maybe that would make you more attractive when she sees you have options too.
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A
female
reader, anonymous, writes (29 December 2010): If your feeling jelouse beacause your best friend has got a boyfriend, then that's defently a bad thing. Jelousy NEVER means you love that person. If your jelousy keeps on building uo, you will lose your best friend.
I suggest talking to her, and tell her how you feel.
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