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Is it possible to go from being gay to straight?

Tagged as: Gay relationships<< Previous question   Next question >>
Question - (18 August 2007) 15 Answers - (Newest, 2 November 2010)
A male United Kingdom age 30-35, anonymous writes:

I'd love to hear from a guy who has turned from being gay to straight. I think that might be happening to me and its driving me absolutely insane. Can it really happen?

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A male reader, Spidy Spider Namibia +, writes (2 November 2010):

Hi...I was straight got gay then got bi and now again straight but if you want to achieve it you have to work hard and think about the positive and negative thoughts

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A female reader, zefir Serbia +, writes (17 January 2010):

Former gay leader goes straight and leaves helm of magazine he founded

Washington D.C., Jul 6, 2007 / 11:03 am (CNA).- A young and prominent gay rights activist has abandoned his homosexual lifestyle and written about it in a column this week for World Net Daily.

“In my experience, ‘coming out’ from under the influence of the homosexual mindset was the most liberating, beautiful and astonishing thing I've ever experienced in my entire life,” writes Michael Glatze.

In his column, Glatze tells of the success he had as the founder of Young Gay America and editor of YGA Magazine. He received the National Role Model Award from Equality Forum, produced the first major documentary film to tackle gay teen suicide, and made several media appearances — including being featured in a cover story of Time magazine.

He was also invited as a panelist at the JFK Jr. Forum at Harvard’s Kennedy School of Business in 2005. It was after this event, however, that he began to have serious doubts about what he was doing with his life and his influence.

“Knowing no one who I could approach with my questions and my doubts, I turned to God,” he writes. “I'd developed a growing relationship with God … Soon, I began to understand things I'd never known could possibly be real, such as the fact that I was leading a movement of sin and corruption.”

He said it became clear to him that “homosexuality prevents us from finding our true self within.” At this point, Glatze was 30, and had been living with a homosexual identity for 16 years.

He came to realize that homosexuality is pornographic; “[it] destroys impressionable [young] minds and confuses their developing sexuality.”

“Homosexuality came easy to me, because I was already weak,” he writes. He explained that he noticed his attraction to men a year after his father died. “At an early age, I was already confused about who I was and how I felt about others,” he writes.

“My confusion about ‘desire’ and the fact that I noticed I was ‘attracted’ to guys made me put myself into the ‘gay’ category at age 14.” He came out as gay at age 20, a year after his mother died.

Glatze is frank in saying that homosexuality is “lust and pornography wrapped into one.” He recounts how he has had to learn to deal with lust and to grow in love for himself. He said his homosexuality ended “once I ‘cut myself off’ from outside influences and intensely focused on inner truth – when I discovered the depths of my God-given self at age 30.”

He reflects on his relationship with God through this period of growth and change: “God came to me when I was confused and lost, alone, afraid and upset. He told me – through prayer – that I had nothing at all to be afraid of, and that I was home; I just needed to do a little house cleaning in my mind.”

Galtze says he believes “all people, intrinsically, know the truth. I believe that is why Christianity scares people so much. It reminds them of their conscience, which we all possess.”

“Sexual truth can be found, provided we're all willing and driven to accept that our culture sanctions behaviors that harm life,” he states.

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A male reader, ropsgala India +, writes (15 April 2009):

I would definitely say that it always possible to do away things which we know that it is not good for us...just have to keep the faith and start doing it from now only...strong determination is always a must...so shd start doing it...its now or never...

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A male reader, lilsexynerd United States +, writes (9 April 2009):

dear readers,

at the moment im gay and always will be but the problem is that my parents don't want me to be.

But my advice to you is if you know your gay or lesbian don't change it because you're going to hurt your self mentally and emotionally and you might even get depressed so don't do it just speek to some one you trust and if you're having the same problem as me that your parents don't want you to be who you are don't worry some way some how they are going to have to deal with it because being gay is not a crime but is nothing you can change in my opinion is nothing you can change.

ok what if they talk about you in school or something well you know what all you got to do is ignore what they say cause is your life not theirs so just forget them and go on with your life not the life that they want you to have because they aren't the ones that are living your life is you and they shouldn't have a problem with that is your life.......

with love

Thank you

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A male reader, anonymous, writes (21 February 2008):

Dear Readers,

It is truly beautifull to read all your comments and responses to this very cricial question "is it possible to go from being gay to straight".

I am 27 years old, male, and I untill today cannot figure out what has happened to me. Love, intimacy, sexual orientation....all human notions that are as complex as their holders.

I was inlove with a woman in college, that I truly loved and was attracted too. I was with her for 3 years, and ended up proposing to her. But I couldn't follow through the marriage. I had gay urges, fantacies, attractions to the same sex. And so I told her and ended up loosing her.

In answer to your question, I would say this: if you know you are gay, don't try to change it. And vice versa. Because the attempt and success might be much more hurfull then you can imagine. Today, I find myself attracted to men but I am toally unsatisfied. Because I still miss her in every possible way and would go back in time if I could.

If you find that person, don't let go of them; whatever sex they may be :)

goodluck to all

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A male reader, anonymous, writes (7 February 2008):

My partner of 14 years has just left me for a woman,i don't believe or understand it i think he is just curious and confused but he felt unhappy so left me to see if this is what he wants.

I love him more than life itself he say he still loves me and would do anything not to fell this way but he didnt want to stay together and make us both unhappy.

Due to the circumstances i still have hope we could get back together if it feels wrong to him.What i don't understand is what a girl 8 years younger than him who knew he was in a gay relationship would want with him.All my female friends say they wouldnt touch him with a barge pole if they were her.

To me its the excitement of the unknow not that he has changed to straight basically over night.

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A male reader, AMer Jordan +, writes (7 November 2007):

This was my main issue and i can say loudly that i overcome this problem because i need that extreemly. DO THINK WHAT U NEED TO THINK , YOU WILL BE YOUR THOUGHTS.

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A reader, anonymous, writes (26 October 2007):

Ah no nevermind. August 2007. Heh, misread that as August 2006... [ahem] Right, yeah. I'll stop now. ^o^

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A reader, anonymous, writes (26 October 2007):

I have to point out that just because a lesbian or a gay man was homosexual for 25 years, and then met a person of the opposite gender, married him or her, it doesn't mean that the 'former' lesbian or gay man turned straight. It means that the lesbian or the gay man found a wonderful partner and is sticking with him or her.

Sexual orientation is a whole different matter from choosing a partner to spend your life with. A guy whom have been homosexual since birth, can very well meet a girl that he falls in love with and get married and have a family that way, but it doesn't mean he is now straight. It just means that his sexual preference is men, but found the love of his life in a woman, and with that love, he can easily and naturally make love to that woman and have offspring.

So with that said and out of the way, I just realized that this thread is super old. Congratulations Martini, you have just posted in a more than one year old thread. [applauds to myself and sighs]

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A male reader, gayguy16 United Kingdom +, writes (25 October 2007):

gayguy16 agony auntif you are still relativly a teenager or you have just gawn into your 20's you could still not have relised your true sexuality,

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A female reader, peacedreamer United States +, writes (19 August 2007):

Gay, straight, bi; who cares. It is the person you are with that matters. it is the people in your life that you become attracted to. If you were "gay" and now you are finding yourself attracted to women, maybe you were just experimenting your sexuality, maybe you were a late bloomer and that made you think you were gay, maybe you are bi, but maybe, just maybe, you see the person you are involved with and that is what leads you to your attractions. Too many labels in this society. My stepson is 17 and is yet to have a girlfriend, but he says he isn't gay. (and no, i didn't ask)...he says he is waiting for someone special. No harm no foul.

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A female reader, beautifultrustnlover United States +, writes (19 August 2007):

beautifultrustnlover agony auntwell before i was married i had a one night stand with a man that was gay we were drunk and the next day he told me he has never been with a woman turning out a few weeks later he wasn't a virgin as i thought a close friend of mine who is gay said that was he's ex. bf and after that he went back to guys but called me saying i turned him stright we never were together again just close friends now and hes not gay at all doesnt even look at men any more also hes married has a daughter that is 4 now so anything can happen trust me anything can happen

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A male reader, anonymous, writes (18 August 2007):

I don't know anyone that has. I am gay and can't imagine that happening so can understand your insanity!

Maybe you're bi and didn't realise it, or maybe it'll pass!

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A female reader, jessekk69 United Kingdom +, writes (18 August 2007):

jessekk69 agony auntone of my close friends was a lesbian for about 25 years of her life, she had many female partners and was never intrested in men. oneday she had a messy break up with her girlfriend, the 2months later found a bloke she really liked, and fell in love, 3 years on she happily married to this man, and expecting there second child any day now. so she changed from gay to straight! so it is possible xx

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A female reader, PoSiOnKiSS United Kingdom +, writes (18 August 2007):

PoSiOnKiSS agony auntNot unless the guy has been really put off by being gay, which would then bring question to was he really gay in the first place. Its usually your 100% gay...or Bi. Ive never heard of any guy going from gay to straight, its usually from gay to Bi, because then they get the best of both worlds.

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