A
female
age
36-40,
anonymous
writes:I'm in love with a married man. I have been seeing him for a little over a year. He was only engaged when I met him,that I found out months later in the relationship. I knew he had a girlfriend but didn't know she was his fiancee. We started having a sexual relationship and then grew feelings on both ends. Then that dreadful day came, wedding day. I tried letting him go but he wouldnt let me. We've talked off and on since then and kept the feelings and sexual relationship. I am very spiritual but i want to know if maybe,just maybe we were meant to be? I am confused and in love and seeking desperate help.
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reader, anonymous, writes (31 December 2010): Think about it: if you were meant to be, he would've married to YOU, not the other woman. Regardless of what he says, he doesn't care enough about you to have an open, normal relationship with you. You are, however, good enough for an affair and that will continue to be the nature of your relationship.
A
male
reader, anonymous, writes (31 December 2010): You are being used in the worst way.
Read up on people who do this, understand that this is not what you hoped it would be.
Cut all contact, now and forever, and get someone who will treat you like you matter.
Get counseling to help you with this, you will need it or you will get involved with someone similar in the future.
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A
female
reader, anonymous, writes (31 December 2010): He was engaged and then married during your relationship. You know precisely what that means, however the reality of it is painful so you toy with the idea that there must be something loving, wonderful and magical behind the actions of a cad.You are spiritual. You should know in your truest heart that you are giving your body and spiritual self to a cad who has devalued you... and you have devalued yourself. Now, you must explore why and you must seek forgiveness for participating in this dynamic of tearing down and fear. When you learned that he was betrothed, you took him anyway. He married someone else while you were available and you still took him on anyway. What are you saying about how you see yourself?Deal with these deeper issues and understand the wrong of it.
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A
female
reader, petina1  +, writes (31 December 2010):
 He was only engaged when you met him, so he could have got out of marrying at any time, but he didnt. You will always be his mistress if you carry on seeing him unless of course y ou let his wife know you are there in the background for him.
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