A
female
age
16-17,
*ikki.palmer
writes:Okay, he was my history teacher and I fell in love with him. i know, stupid move, but anyway, he is just such a great person, and he understands me like no-one else does, even though he doesn't always say he does. Yes he's married and has kids, but I don't care, it doesn't bother me.He has flirted with me many times, and he told me that he trusted me, and he treated me differently to anyone else he taught.he also used to sneak up on me a lot, and thinking back, when he did this he would always come inside my personal space so he'd be standing right beside me or behind me; and in classes he always used to stare at me, even when I was actually looking at me; and he also always used to have heaps of private jokes with me because no-one else really got them. We always used to be able to talk about anything. Do you think it is possible that he may have liked me as well? i knpw that's sort of illegal, but you can't help how you feel, right? I liked this teacher for at least a year before I actually fell in love with him. I have been in love with him for two and a half years, and I think he knew as well. And now he won't even talk to me, like he's avoiding me, and when I try to talk to him, he blows me off. I haven't even done anything to him, so why would he be avoiding meYeah, I know you're all thinking that I'm not really in love with him, but seriously I am, I know my own feelings and I'm mature enough to know whether it's a crush or not. I just want to know what (or what not) to do. Help!
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crush, fell in love, flirt Reply to this Question |
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female
reader, nikki.palmer +, writes (21 July 2009):
nikki.palmer is verified as being by the original poster of the question OMG! He left! I know this is probably a blessing in disguise, but I am so upset. He did it in the middle of the year, without telling anybody. I can't believe he would do that. And I swear I saw him on his last day too. I saw him, and he wanted to talk to me, and I brushed him off. Why on earth did I do that? Help, I'm freaking out.
A
female
reader, nikki.palmer +, writes (22 March 2009):
nikki.palmer is verified as being by the original poster of the questionBTW: He is thirty-four, just in case you thought he was in his fifties or something, even I have my limits.
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A
female
reader, xCharliix  +, writes (22 February 2009):
 Hey, dont be harsh!.. It's perfectly normal to fancy teachers- we look up to them as role models because they are so involved in our lives.. we see them 5 days a week for 5,6,7 years!!! How can we not?!!
And mi email address was blocked so here it is again..
charliie @ hotmail .co.uk
(obviously without the spaces- just so it doesnt get blocked again)
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A
male
reader, MinionServatis  +, writes (21 February 2009):
 Really, get a life man, its not ok to sleep or go out with your boss, and its not right to go out with your teacher, get out of that stupid lie that you live in.
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A
female
reader, jamieanderson +, writes (21 February 2009):
 The feelings you are having are perfectly normal. I've had major crushes on some teachers of mine in the past. However, it is clear that he doesn't feel the same way about you- and if, in the unlikely circumstance, that he did, he will not take anything any further. He has a family and a job to hold on to. You will have read about occasions where a teacher does form a relationship with his/her student, but the reactions these relationships get are very negative. They can never function no matter how strongly you feel. The best thing to do is not to try and act on your feelings. Focus on your studies and get through school. Once you are out of there you will be able to meet a whole array of new people and friends to get close to and even fall in love with. You are infatuated by this man, his 'flirting' is likely to be misread on your part. It is natural to feel the way you do, but those feelings will fade with time. You just need to think about other things, and try not to make any moves on him. He is an adult with a job to do, to teach his students. Try and focus on your friends and family, those your age. It is always harder when you have to see him in your history classes, but you need to try and move on from how you feel now as nothing can realistically come of your feelings for him.Good Luck,Jamie
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A
female
reader, xCharliix +, writes (21 February 2009):
I am in exactly the same situation at the moment..You just don't know what to do, do you? You try and give it time and it just gets stronger as the weeks go past, or months or years in your case.I've fallen for my head of year, since december last year- not as long as you, but even i can't bare it and its not be that long. How have you coped with it for that long?My teachers the same, smiles at me, looks at me in class, hugs me, enjoys talking to me.. but you take it as if he likes you because your so desperate for the hope that i could happen.. but you know it's just wishful thinking..Mine hasn't got a family, but his girlfriend of 3 years is also a teacher at my school :S.. so it makes it even harder for me..I see him every day at school so it's hard to avoid him and get over him..It just seems like an impossible task. the more time goes on the stronger the feelings get, and the more you want them...Love sucksadd me on MSN... we can get through this together[email address blocked]
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A
female
reader, lwstudent +, writes (21 February 2009):
He is your teacher and then reason behind him avoiding you is probably because he knows how serious the situation would be if anything were to happen. He is doing the right thing by keeping his distance. if you really rhink you love him then how would feel if he lost his job over it? Not to mention his family. It is completely normal for girls like yourself to fall for a teacher, and it will pass. You have to try to forget about him and just see him as a teacher, nothing more. Plus i'm sure there are plenty of boys your own age for you to go out withGood luck, stay strong!
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A
male
reader, anoms +, writes (21 February 2009):
 yes this one is so so common, do a search on this subject, i wouldnt be suprised if every onther girl in your class feels the same way. but having a laugh and a joke with somone really is'nt love espesially if its your teacher. i dont think anyone hear is going to tell you to go for it because its so common aswell as soo ILLIGAL. even if you did establish some kind of teacher-underage student love with him, where does it go from ther, its just a fantasy. when real things like this happen lives get destroyed..and for what?
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A
female
reader, Love_is_all_youu_need +, writes (21 February 2009):
 I completely understand your situation, i've been there myself.You may well be in love with the guy, alot of pupils develop crushes on teachers and just look at them in admiration and respect. But in some situations, feelings can be become much more serious and intense. As did with me, it was probably the worst period of life i've ever exprienced. My life felt unbearable because i knew it would never happen! It almost drove me to suicide infact.All i can advise you, is to not cross the barrier between teacher and student. It can get you into alot of trouble and he would be in danger of losing his job. Have you been flirting with him at all? This could be the reason he is avoiding you because he knows it is wrong and could cause alot of conflict, for his personal life aswel.The worst thing about your situation is that he's got a family of his own, do you think he would throw that away just to be with you? Sorry for sounding harsh, but its questions like this you have to consider if you believe you will ever have a chance with him.Eventually you may have to move on, as i did. Which is the reality for majority of these situations. However, if you wait until you're of legal age and at this point you still think you love him and he has told you he feels the same, then go for it. But just don't expect your/his family to approve.
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