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Is it normal for husbands and boyfriend to follow lingerie models on social media?

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Question - (17 June 2017) 6 Answers - (Newest, 23 June 2017)
A female United States age 30-35, anonymous writes:

Is it normal for guys to follow all these girls on instagram and like their half naked pictures on instagram every time they post them? I'm a grown woman and single but I can tell u when I'm in a relationship I don't have eyes for other men and in no way shape or form do I start liking guys that are half naked- should I think this is okay since most of my guy friends do this?

One of my guy friends has been going out with his gf for three years and unnoticed (she doesn't have it) - he literally follows all these accounts with naked woman on it and likes their photos- is this normal?

I get that ur not acting on it but I find it disrespectful and this is one of the main reasons why I can't date because I find it disrespectful- I don't do that

Am I being dramatic? Are all guys like this- should I just be okay thag they do this in social media?

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A female reader, aunt honesty Ireland + , writes (23 June 2017):

aunt honesty agony auntEveryone's definition off 'normal' is different, and everyone looks for different things in relationships. Personally my partner does not do these kind off things. Am not sure how I would feel if he did. It really depends on the relationship and the people in it. Luckily I have never had to deal with this issue in my current relationship.

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A male reader, anonymous, writes (19 June 2017):

I did it, following pages with women lingerie and sexy poses, thinking it is harmless as i am not cheating physically as i wouldnt mind if my wife follows a page with male models or sexy men, but when she saw it, she was very upset, so i unfollow, so your partner should respect you and unfollow those pages too.

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A female reader, Youcannotbeserious United Kingdom + , writes (19 June 2017):

Youcannotbeserious agony auntWhy are you worried about this? This is not YOUR boyfriend. Why are you keeping tabs on him?

To answer your question, I think it is a bit like dogs chasing cars. What would you do with it if you caught it, little doggie? Know what I'm saying?

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A female reader, anonymous, writes (18 June 2017):

I think a lof men today have a grand sense of entitlement and see it as their right and many women are afraid to challenge this for

Fear of appearing uncool . Personally I'd find it very disturbing . The men that do this rarely can bake one woman they respect for achievements . I doubt they have women who are role models for personal qualities added on Facebook yet they seem to value women purely their physical attributes . To these men , men are people , women are objects . Whether you want to be with a man like that is an individual choice . Many men seem to think they are becoming freer to judge women's bodies more openly which in a way they are but also they are showing women what they really think of us and the tide is turning , smart women will eventually leave these apes alone with their hands and pictures

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A female reader, Andie's Thoughts United Kingdom + , writes (18 June 2017):

Andie's Thoughts agony auntI'm with Honeypie. It's not cheating and it's no different than softporn, really, but I wouldn't be comfortable dating someone who did.

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A female reader, Honeypie United States + , writes (18 June 2017):

Honeypie agony auntShould you "just" be OK with it?

That depends, do you expect everyone else to have the same values as you? at all times? OR not?

Is it "normal" for men in marriages and relationships to do this? I honestly don't know. I asked my husband and he laughed and asked me why on Earth he should have those people on his FB? Unless they are actual friends.

I think in this day and age of "instant gratification" it's not strange that it happens.

Would I date/marry someone who did this? I don't think so. While "nothing" is really going on (besides these guys ogling strangers in their undies) it's not like they are friends or even TALK to each other so I don't really see the point. For me, if this was a teenage guy or someone really young I can see it being more "normal" than for a grown man. Kind of reminds me of the "olden days" where young men would look at the underwear models in Sears (or whatever catalog) and thought it was very naughty.

If I did meet a guy who did this I probably would ask the question WHY... And then judge AFTER the answer.

As for you not wanting to date because SOME men do this, well that is your right. However, it's a "little" unfair to judge them all by the actions of a few. But if you are happy being single... then enjoy it.

As for your male friend who does this, so what? His life, his choice, HIS Facebook. If you don't approve have you ever asked him WHY?

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