A
female
age
36-40,
anonymous
writes:I still have feeling for my son father, they are not as strong as when we first broke up, but I do still have feelings and him keeping in constant contact does not help my "getting over him process". He is in a new relationship, I am in one also. He claims sex with his new girlfriend is boring, and is always calling me up telling me. The other day he called and began to tell me he was playing with himself, and thinking about me. Then he goes on to ask for sex saying it was nothing wrong because we have such good sex. I declined, so he asked me to have phone sex with him, I did. But I don't understand why me is he telling me the girl is bad in bed, and why am I the alternative.... I only had phone sex to keep him happy. Why won't he let me go.... Why won't I let him go, so that we can both move on??? Why do I feel like it is still my duty to satisfy him?
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broke up, move on, phone sex Reply to this Question
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Fancy yourself as an agony aunt? Add your answer to this question! A
male
reader, Asexy +, writes (8 October 2007):
 I agree with Penta. Phone sex is sex. And unless you have an open relationship with your boyfriend (that sex with other people is okay) then it's cheating. Sorry hon.
If your boyfriend wouldn't have a problem with it, if you told him, then that is between the two of you. But it's not a marriage thing. I think any guy who caught his girl doing phone sex with her ex would be upset. I certainly would.
A
reader, anonymous, writes (8 October 2007): You are encouraging Him!!!! Why dont you put the phone down on him when he starts? Why dont you change your phone number? If you do get to speak to him in the future then tell him that this isnt going on anymore! Let him know that you are not going to tolerate this. How would you feel if your bloke told his ex that your sex life was boring, gutted!! I know i would be. Tell him to stop it now. Don't be a pathetic female by going along with this. Get a life girl and stop this now!!!
take care
xx
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A
female
reader, anonymous, writes (8 October 2007): Thank You all for your replies, and I would love to talk to you BlueEyedAngel, but I don't see your email address.. Also I have to comment on Penta's answer. You said you would have felt cheated on if your husband would have had sex with an ex. Well He is not married to her, and I am not married to my boyfriend, so i see no reson for guilt. If we were marrried that is different, but just being boyfriend and girlfriend people must realize that is just what it is dating, you are considered a suitor, look it up in the dictionary. As americans I beleive we are too possessive. And I will be on the back burner because the new girlfriend has a far way to go before she gets to my level, and from the looks of things she better get it together quick....
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A
reader, anonymous, writes (8 October 2007): That is ridiculous, he is showing you a great deal of disrespect being your ex and talking about how boring his new GF is shows he is a selfish disrespectful pig.
Good riddance, just maintain civil but distant contact for the sake of your child, and tell him the next time he asks for sex, that it wasn't that good, and your new BF is taking care of you just fine, that ought to put his big ego to rest!
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A
female
reader, penta +, writes (8 October 2007):
 It is NOT your duty. You left him and are with someone else. If anything, your only "duties" are to your son and your new guy.
Become a broken record: say the same thing over and over again. "No." Do not give him your reasons; they're none of his business and if you share them, he can argue about them. "No" is all you have to say, over and over. Look BORED (or sound bored) when he asks. Give him no emotional feedback.
By the way, if my husband had given phone sex to an ex, I would have considered it cheating on me. I'd have been very hurt. Think about that the next time your looser ex wants to have sex with you rather than his current GF.
Good luck.
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A
female
reader, BlueEyedAngel +, writes (8 October 2007):
 It is not your job to keep him satisfied no more. If you are in a relationship and are happy you need to stop having phone sex with him and tell him not to call you no more if all he is wanting is to have phone sex. He sounds like he is just wanting to keep you on the back burner for back up.Good luck and if you wanna talk you can email me
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