A
male
age
36-40,
anonymous
writes:Is it a big thing for a girl to be broken in? and another quick question is that my girlfriend has told me about a fling in her past when she told me I became jealous its because she is more experience then me, when she told I think I even started losing a trust in her n started thinkin less of her for some reason is this bad?she told me a month after going out with her she sed she forgot, before she told me I completely trusted her. and by the way she is stil a virgin she told she onli did kissing with guy i feel guilty that Im thinkin like this and keep having visions of her being with other guys! didnt expect this to happen to me.
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her past, jealous, kissing Reply to this Question
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Fancy yourself as an agony aunt? Add your answer to this question! A
female
reader, anonymous, writes (31 March 2007): yeh a girls first time is ment to be special, well most girls who have self respect want to wait for the right person and they want it to be special! so to most girls yeh loosing your virginity isn't to be taken lightly it's a big thing to most of us!! Even for sum lads too and the way yew reffer to it as " breakin in" kinda puts the point across that yew dnt think much of it. so think about it and think about how she feels and yew shud trust her she only kissed the guy and at least she told yew, but if yew cnt get over it then yew shud finish it with her instaed of as u put it "breaking her in".
A
reader, anonymous, writes (30 March 2007): I agree with ponu. Referring to "breaking in" your girlfriend is such a crude term and it shows a lot about how you view women and sex. You are a hypocrite for despising your girlfriends sexual past yet at the same time are happy to "break her in" and make her more sexually experienced. It's because of guys like you that so many girls end up having more sexual experience than they wanted to have. I'm not surprised your girlfriend isn't upfront and honest with you about her past, you seem incredibly insecure and I suspect you probably are causing her to feel quite bad about herself when she shouldn't - be careful because eventually she'll have enough and find a guy who doesn't think less of her just because she isn't a pure virgin who hasn't even looked at another guy.
I think all these feelings you have are because you are jealous and insecure. You need to pick yourself up from this by accepting how things are or you will eventually loose your girlfriend.
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A
male
reader, Ponungalungb  +, writes (30 March 2007):
 There's something to be said for your terminology - "broken in"? Your attitude toward this girl doesn't seem to be one of respect or love. You sound possessive and insecure. . . and I'd suggest you do her a favor and get out of her life. Go do some growing up.
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A
female
reader, anonymous, writes (30 March 2007): What you have got to remember is her past is her past and there is now nothing that she can do to change it. As for is it a big thing for a girl to lose a virginity it depends on the type of girl.
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A
female
reader, Patient1 +, writes (30 March 2007):
 It is very important to most girls to lose their viriginity and not so important for others, it all depends on the girl. But over all I would say "yes"! It needs to be a special and comfortable situation. As far as her past, I think you should try your best to let that go. First of all, everyone has a past and if you live life holding it against them then you're likely not to get very far in any relationship. Secondly, it was only kissing, I wouldn't necessarily say that she was more experienced than you because she kissed someone. And as far as the trust, you should trust her because she did tell you about it. She could have held that from you forever in fear of your feelings about it. But she was honest and she did tell you. If you really like this girl, I wouldn't hold the fact that she has kissed someone in the past get in the way of your future together. Good Luck!
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