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Is he worth keeping around? He doesn't spend any time with me anymore!

Tagged as: Dating, Teenage, Troubled relationships, Trust issues<< Previous question   Next question >>
Question - (13 September 2009) 2 Answers - (Newest, 29 September 2009)
A female United States age 30-35, *ynsey writes:

my boyfriend has been going through a complete transformation:

i have known this guy for a while and he used to always text me.

about 2-3 times everyday from the end of my sophmore year to the end of my sophmore summer.

when i found out i was going to transfer to his school he seemed really excited, on the very first day when all of the 'new kids' had to come in he came in to see me.

later on he asked me to be his girlfriend, at school was great he would always kiss me before i went to class.

fast forward about a week in the relationship he slowly waited for me and stopped walking me to his locker.

then we had a three day weekend and he just didnt hangout with me at all.

after i had brought it up to him he said that he was just busy and it wasnt that big of a deal.

so i just though it was me that being to sensitive so i let it slide.

now at school we hardly see eachother at school and he doesnt see me goodbye at the end of school.

on friday september 11th we went to the peprally and i literally had to find him

at first he was sitting with me and then he scooted back a bleacher behind me and sat with his best friend.

i really dont mind i let him hangout with his friends and he can be himself with them around me but at the end of the pep rally his friend dan thought it would be funny to start pushing me down the bleachers and then he started doing it after i had told them to stop.

since i was trying to catch my balance i lost track of them and they went to oppisate way i was pushed. so i had to cut through the crowds of kids to catch up with the two of them.

they were about 2 yards in front of me and were not slowing down.

when they walked out the school i could hardly see them they were about 10 yards away from me and i had to call his name.

when i did they just turned around and looked at me before they kept walking on. at this point i was extremely upset. i went home crying because he made me feel completely rejected and like his toy to make fun of.

later that night he went to the game and i had to meet him up there, i told him how upset it had made me that he did that but he said he was just joking the entire time.

during the game i was upset but he kept being cute and telling me that i cant be mad at him.

he never stands by me when were in public now and i can hardly get a peice of gum from him.

after the game though after his friend left we walked to his car and i refused to go inside, after lip singing a song to me i eventually gave in because i really do like a lot and hes so sweet when were alone.

the next day was our schools homecoming(saturday) in which he wasnt taking me to because when i had asked him on tuesday the week of the dance if we were going he told me no because his friend had some girl problems and wasnt going to homecoming so i told him i understood but it would have been nice if he had told me before the week of that we werent going.

but he hadnt texted me at all until 12:11 when i finallt decided to text him and said hey he replyed hi and i asked him what he was doing he said he was on his way to the husker football game against arkasas and i then asked him id nebraska was any good yet, he than said shutup. so i said hey i can be mean if i want to and he said fine i just wont talk to you.

he didnt text me all day...

that night i texted him and told him he was pissing me off and he replied why and i never texted me back hoping that maybe he was actually worried but he never texted me back.

today he hasnt texted me once...

i asked him to call me later on tonight and im going to lay out the fact that hes acts like a jerk when he redicules me in front of his friend and it really does hurt me espcially when i trust him so much and i really like him.

i cant even type out my problem without starting to tear up.

i really need advice from a stranger so i know that im not being the irrational one.

i just want to know if hes worth keeping around.

View related questions: best friend, text

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A female reader, anonymous, writes (29 September 2009):

No he is not worth keeping around. U are young an don't need to waste yourr time on silly boys who can't act right. You deserve better, guys realize shit until after we are gone, then they wanna come bac to us..that's if he cares enough. But being strong women that we kno we can be, we tend to stick around thinkin he's gonna change..they don't always do. So I would jus do my own thing an find some guy that will give u all the attention you deserve. :)

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A female reader, ally922 United Kingdom +, writes (14 September 2009):

Hey. I have recently just came out of a relationship similar to yours. And we broke up because it hurt him to see me so upset and he knew he wasn't mature enough to have a relationship. I did the same as you and let him do his on thing and i felt neglected. When i spoke up though he realised how hurt i was. In your situation however he did not care when you told him your feelings. And you are not being irrational you just want the truth from him. Personally i think you should give him an ultimatum, either he works with you to make it better or you stop going out. Believe me this may hurt if he gives up but it is better now than waiting longer as you will feel foolish for not ending it sooner. You deserve better and even though he is sweet when it is just you two, he is imature and selfish when around others. You should end it before he does cause you will feel better if you end it rather than him dumping you. I hope i have helped.

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